It unlocks something deep within him, an ache to hear those words that he wasn't aware he was harboring. Maybe he's needed to hear this for years. You aren't cruel. Is that why he became an EMT, a caretaker? To convince himself of that, with minimal success?
You aren't cruel.
The tears spill over again, accompanied by a choked sob, and a cascade of smaller, softer ones that follow, racking his slumped shoulders with shakes as they overtake his whole being. He finds himself clutching fistfuls of the front of Kostya's shirt so tightly his fingers ache, pressing his face into his shoulder and hoping for the bracing solidity of arms around him as it all comes crashing down at last—he has kept himself from hurting for so long, applying layer after layer of shoddy bandaging as the past bled through each one, and he's so tired. He doesn't have it in him any more. Maybe this is the start of a nervous breakdown. All he knows is that a dam has broken, and now the tears are coming, and coming, and coming from deep inside of him. ]
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It unlocks something deep within him, an ache to hear those words that he wasn't aware he was harboring. Maybe he's needed to hear this for years. You aren't cruel. Is that why he became an EMT, a caretaker? To convince himself of that, with minimal success?
You aren't cruel.
The tears spill over again, accompanied by a choked sob, and a cascade of smaller, softer ones that follow, racking his slumped shoulders with shakes as they overtake his whole being. He finds himself clutching fistfuls of the front of Kostya's shirt so tightly his fingers ache, pressing his face into his shoulder and hoping for the bracing solidity of arms around him as it all comes crashing down at last—he has kept himself from hurting for so long, applying layer after layer of shoddy bandaging as the past bled through each one, and he's so tired. He doesn't have it in him any more. Maybe this is the start of a nervous breakdown. All he knows is that a dam has broken, and now the tears are coming, and coming, and coming from deep inside of him. ]