but a strange light in the sky was shining right into my eyes

[singmod]

JANUARY 2024 EVENT

PROMPT ONE — THE AURORA: NASCENCE: Following the strange dream at new year, a three-day Aurora takes place. During which, Interlopers discover a possible ally in the mysterious woman heard in the static and heard in the dream — potentially earning new abilities.

PROMPT TWO — ADUST: The Interlopers find out what happened to the owners of long-destroyed Milton House in the form of hauntings.

PROMPT THREE — THE VISITOR: Interlopers find themselves with an unwelcome visitor — a shadow doppelganger here to make everything absolutely worse.

THE AURORA: NASCENCE

WHEN: January 13th - 15th.
WHERE: Everywhere.
CONTENT WARNINGS: potentially disturbing dreams; dreams of being burned alive; some minor supernatural horror; some minor ‘ghost’ horror/hauntings; death of npcs in various ways including suicide, murder or exposure to elements.


In the middle of the month, it happens. A herald. The noise starts: faint at first, but then growing louder. An ethereal, high-pitched chorus of sounds difficult to place. There’s a kind of electrical buzzing with it all, a low, endless hum punctuated with cracks and pops. The sky is alive with sound, and with it comes the swirling streaking of colour against the inky black of night: The Aurora has come.

Much of what happened previously happens again: Streetlights, illuminating the town’s roads; lights in stores and homes will come alive, buzzing and flickering at times. Previously abandoned cars will turn on, their headlights blaring. Electronics that had previously seemed broken flick on — and whilst there are no broadcasts available on televisions, and the radio waves only drone on in static, both only occasionally blaring standard emergency broadcasts. Any computers and phones will turn on, but will have no internet or reception. Instead, Interlopers may find texts and emails — many of them unsent. The everyday lives of their users stored within, now readable.

There are still some instances of the ‘ghosts’ from the previous Auroras, but they are now only faint outlines, and far fewer in number. However, whilst the Aurora would usually only last until the next morning on sporadic nights over the month — this time it will last for a full three days. The world is plunged into darkness, a seemingly endless night with only the Aurora to light the skies.

On the second night of lights and noise, a voice calls out to you: static-like, and distant — as if someone speaks over a radio. A woman’s voice. It is the same one you’ve been hearing for a few weeks now, but finally it is far stronger than the scant whispers of name and the word ‘help’. She is far clearer now.

“You.” she says. She may whisper your name, too. “I see you.” You’re unable to speak back, the communication is only one way. She sounds upset, but there’s something more… a kind of wonder, perhaps.

”It’s not just a regular aurora borealis, but then you probably worked that out already, haven’t you? It’s so much more than that. Everything is… changing.”

”I don’t know how you can go back. But— but I can help. Maybe. Maybe I can make this place easier, somehow. I need help, but I’m stuck—” There’s frustration in her voice for a moment. ”It took from you. Took you away. It doesn’t always have to take. We can take, too. Sleep. I will help you take back. You will survive this. You will not go into the Dark. This is not the end.”

You have no idea what that means, for the most part. But you might just end up taking the chance and doing as the woman asked, even if it’s difficult with the noise and light with the Aurora. Sleep, and a dream may come to you.

FREE RUNNER: The colours of the Aurora dance around you in your dreamscape. You dream you are a magnificent stag, galloping through the snowy woods with ease. You seem to go on and on, never tiring, never slowing. You feel like the wind, or perhaps the very wind itself carries you. Not once do you stumble or fall, even when the snow is thick and deep, or the ground is shaky and uneven beneath you. You feel free.

When you awaken, you feel the most refreshed you’ve ever felt since you first came here. For the final day of the Aurora, you are bursting with energy and even when the lights in the sky fade — that revitalised feeling within you remains. There’s something within you that understands: you are the Free Runner. The ground will yield beneath you, your energy will not desert you, the wind will carry you.

LIGHT BRINGER: The colours of the Aurora dance around you in your dreamscape. You dream of sitting by a lonely campfire in the mouth of a cave at night, warming your hands. As you sit, a strange feeling comes over you, a desire to reach out to the flames. And so you do, reaching with both hands into the fire — gripping at the white-hot embers. It burns you, and for a moment there is blinding hot pain as the fire suddenly explodes around you, consuming you whole. But the pain soon stops. The fire doesn’t burn you. No, you have become the blaze — your body warmed. You burn bright enough that the darkness around you turns into day.

When you awaken the next morning, you feel warmed and comfortable. As if even the coldest of winters couldn’t reach your bones. The warmth remains even when the Aurora ends, and you are left with the innate understanding:you are the Light Bringer. The power of flame is at your very fingertips. You master the light, life, warmth.

AURORA CALL: The colours of the Aurora dance around you in your dreamscape. You dream you are standing in the very sky itself, at the Aurora’s height. Colour and sound twirls around you, within you — and you feel it curl into your body. Your head fills with noise, a chorus of voices calling out, snippets of conversation echoing within you. A woman’s voice calls to you, it is the same voice that spoke to you before you slept: “Don’t you understand it now? We are all connected. The Aurora connects us.”

And you do, you do understand it.

When you awaken, you feel connected to the world around you. To the very people who live amongst you. You feel less lonely, a kind of kinship with others. You have heard the Aurora’s Call and you have answered it, unlocked a connection with your fellow Interlopers. You will be heard.

NOTHING: The colours of the Aurora dance around you in your dreamscape, but only for a moment. The edges of your vision begin the blur with black, slowly closing in until everything goes dark and you fall into a deep, dreamless sleep. You awaken, and although you feel rested, as if the dreamless darkness has helped you feel a little more ready to take on the day — nothing else about you has changed.

ADUST

WHEN: From mid-month to month end.
WHERE: Milton House.
CONTENT WARNINGS: fire; house fire; death of a child/children; hauntings; ghosts; mental manipulation; illusions of burning/being burned; potential injuries via falling/unstable building collapsing.

There is a reason why it is advised to avoid Milton House other than the simple fact that it’s a miracle the house is still standing. Once one of the largest buildings in the town of Milton, it is now a former shell of what was once a fine and grand house. It has lain in ruin for many years, dilapidated and host to a great deal of fire damage.

While he is in town, Methuselah will not speak of the place, but he often looks sad when it has been brought up in conversation. “A great tragedy.” he will say before falling into a pensive silence. “A blackened mark on the town’s memory.” He does not wish to say much more of what happened: sometimes there are things that are just too painful. He will continue to advise the ruin is left alone, out of respect, and the fact that the place is a danger.

Of course, advice will not stop anyone from attempting to get into the ruins and exploring the house, even if it is in fact highly dangerous.

The sounds of voices and whispers may be enough to pique anyone’s interest. You're sure you heard something, maybe you should go to check it out?

It is true in the fact that the house itself is incredibly dangerous structurally: floors and stairs may give way and you’ll find your foot (and half of you) falling right through the floorboards. Damp and rot that have long since set in, and it will be dangerous to breathe in. But you’ll find that the house itself is pretty ordinary: this was once a family home. Just about the entirety of the house and its contents aren't salvageable, but you’ll be able to find out a little about who once lived here.

There are faded, half-destroyed photos that show a family of five: a father, mother, and three young children all under the age of ten. The father with warm, beaming smiles, the mother has kind eyes, the two oldest boys with toothy grins much like their father, the younger girl looks shy, wanting to hide against her mother. They look happy. Just a typical family. In a world where so many strange things are happening, it feels so strange to look upon these family photos and around this home to realise that they simply lost their home in a house fire.

But as you hold a family picture, or some half-destroyed trinket: a toy, a shoe, a book, a vase, you’ll find the item will suddenly catch alight, bursting into flames in your very hands. The flames do not burn you, and as you discard the item, it will fall to the floor as if nothing had happened.

Then, it comes to you. Here and there. Different sensations that stop and start suddenly: the house groans and creaks around you; the smell of smoke enters your nose; the sound of fire cracking and popping with a roar fills your ears; the sensation of heat against your skin; the clawing and suffocating feeling in your lungs that makes you cough and choke; the sounds of terrified shrieks of children echoing above you. Feelings flood you: fear, panic. When you next turn around, the entire house is aflame around you, and you can’t tell if this is real or if you’re reliving some terrifying memory.

You need to leave, get out of here. For some, it will be what comes naturally. You’ll have to fight through the flames and escape the house before it burns down completely around you. You’ll have to fight your way out, find an exit not already consumed by flames — through a window, perhaps. Crashing out of the house and into the snow, you’ll look back and see Milton House just as you entered it: nothing more than a half-burned ruin.

But for others, there will be another pull. You are drawn upstairs, to the screams of children. You need to get to them, to help them, save them. You will battle through the flames, heading towards the ruins of what was a child’s bedroom, or towards the bathroom. Inside either, you will find a figure cowering, engulfed wholly in flames: one in the bathtub or one in the closet. You recognise them as the two sons from the family pictures.

Mom. They will call you. Or Dad. They weep, terrified of the flames. I’m scared, I’m scared. I want the fire to go away. Help me. Stay here.

The tragedy of Milton House is before you. More than just a fire. What is more tragic than the death of a child? What silences voices? Breaks spirits? Leaves one helpless to act in the wake of such a passing?

There is something to be done here. You are not so powerless. Calm the child. Offer gentle assurances. They will get out. They are safe. You are there for them. You will stay. Embracing them will set you alight. Too hot. Too bright. It will hurt, but you won’t burn. But don’t let go; holding them will eventually calm them down enough for the flames to grow dim, to slowly ease their spirits to rest.

Soon enough, the flames will go out and the child will disappear, leaving you alone in a decaying, dilapidated room.

In the churchyard of Milton, there is a family grave by the name of Barker. Three lie within it: Thomas it reads, and his beloved sons, Patrick and Christopher.

THE VISITOR

WHEN: The month of January.
WHERE: Everywhere.
CONTENT WARNINGS: erything absolutely worse.
THE VISITOR — CONTENT WARNINGS: supernatural beings; dream-related horror/disturbing dreams; doppelgangers; themes of depression; themes of self-harm; themes of isolation; potential themes of suicide.


It seems the dream of the New Year and the Aurora dreams are not the only odd sleep-related instances occurring this month. You first notice that something is off when a strange dream pulls you from sleep. The dream may feel like any particular dream you have, whether it be a usual nightmare or strange concoction your brain has conjured up for you this night. Maybe it’s a dream you’ve had before, maybe it’s a new dream entirely. But no matter the dream, there is one thing that is odd about it. In tiny moments within the dream, you notice that there is something different, something that feels out of place. Something is there that shouldn’t be.

A figure, tall and silent, entirely made of shadow stands lurking in the background. It looks human, but there is not much more that you can really describe further. It is a sad, unsettling presence.

When you awaken, eyes bleary from sleep, and you look about the room, to the bottom of your bed, for a half-moment you see that figure standing there silently. That unsettling sadness permeates the room, and after a few seconds of blinking and sitting up — the figure disappears. Perhaps it was just some trick of the mind, some half-awake illusion.

But the next time you sleep, it appears again. The same figure, the same emotions surrounding it. And when you awaken, it stands at the bottom of your bed once more. Only this time, it lingers, and you find yourself staring down the figure before it disappears once more.

Over the next several days, the presence continues to linger more and more. It stands silently in the corner of the room of your home; it hovers by the window, staring out into the snow; it stands in the middle of the road as you go about your business. More and more, it is there. Always standing, always watching — silent and sad.

No one else seems to notice it, only you. And over time, the shape of it seems to change — the vague, undefined shape of it slowly shifts into something you recognise. The same hair, the same height, the same way it holds itself: it is exactly like you. A perfect doppelganger, a second shadow. And with it, it exudes an oppressive sadness, a particular kind of loneliness. It is suffocating, bleeding into you.

It makes you withdraw from the world around you, from the people around you. Perhaps you stop spending time with others, retreating into solitude. You hide from others, keep to yourself. You find yourself not sleeping at all or perhaps sleeping too much. Perhaps what little you already eat becomes nothing. The shadowy doppelganger draws ever closer to you, close enough to touch you - ever hovering at your shoulder. Its presence bores down on you, making you feel small and more and more alone even with its ‘company’. No one else can seem to see it but you, mentioning it to others will earn odd looks, or even concern. It seems you and your double are alone together.

Hopefully, those around you will notice the change in you. How you stopped reaching out, how you’ve stopped taking care of yourself. Hopefully they will see something isn’t right and reach out. You are doomed to the doppelganger's company otherwise.

However, those around you can push the shadowy double away, and can break its influence and hold over you. Genuine care and concern for you will have it shrinking back. Perhaps it is a kind word, perhaps it is the gentle but insisting coaxing to eat. Perhaps it is an attentive ear to listen to your thoughts, to how the presence has made you feel. Maybe it is even the simplest of touches, an embrace or the holding of a hand, the grip of a shoulder. Continued connection with you will slowly have the visitor’s power diminish.

And hopefully it is done before it is too late, or it may be all too easy to fade into the Long Dark.

FAQs

THE AURORA: NASCENCE

1. Aurora Feats are now unlocked! Please see the following page for more information. Aurora Feats are completely optional.

2. Interlopers will only receive ONE Aurora Event. The only time this is available is this month. After January, players will have to wait for the next Feat round for another chance at an Aurora Feat.

3. This Aurora will last a full three days. It will be a period of only night.

4. For more information on the ghostly loops seen during the Aurora, see this previous event, under 'The Aurora: Aftershocks' prompt.

5. For new players who would like a little extra context regarding the woman can look at December's Tales From The Northern Territories, under the 'New Happenings in December' section.

ADUST

1. Characters will not be physically burned in the fire, but only feel as if they have been. The effects of this illusion will last a short time after they're out the house before they will fade.

2. The only real injuries characters can sustain will be from fall damage, or if the floor gives way and their feet go through, etc. whilst in the house.

3. The children cannot leave the house. They will be too scared to leave. In addition, they are tethered to the house, given that this is where they died. Simply being calmed/comforted is the best way to help them and they will disappear after that.

THE VISITOR

1. An Interloper's Visitor can't be seen by anyone but the Interloper themselves.

2. The Visitor can be spoken to, but it will not speak back. It cannot be interacted with and is intangible.

PLOTTING POST

Comments

[notarat]

This may just be the strangest thing he has seen in this entire place - which is saying something, given the entirely unsettling dream from only a little while ago. But everything that's going on here is so antithetical to what Hickey is like, and even more so when the other only seemed even more energetic the last while. Is this the kickback from that?

.. he has no clue. It could be so many things, given the strange nature of this place. And it's not like Billy could get a doctor to come see the other, considering the one doctor Billy knows here would never want to come see Hickey.

It leaves him standing by the side of the bed for a moment, almost awkwardly as he tries to contemplate what to even do. In the end it leads him moving to sit down on the side of the bed, next to the other man's turned away body.

"Don't be pettish," he mumbles - look, purposefully facing away from him is very juvenile, okay!! - with his voice on the quiet side. "You are never tired. You've been running around like a hare for the past week."

[friendsfordinner]

Hickey continues to be pettish. He doesn't turn to face Billy, he doesn't attempt to move. Instead, he curls in on himself even further, as if he can make himself into a small little ball and keep away from the world. It's what he deserves, after all. To be away from people.

Billy getting closer shows that there are other odd signs. Hickey's hair is greasy, the sort of greasy it gets without regular wash. He's wearing the same clothes he wore yesterday, clothes that should have been in the wash by now. He looks like he needs a bath but all he wants to do right now is sleep.

"I'm tired now, yeah?" he snaps. But there's no venom in it, no fire. It's a quiet sort of snappish from a man so exhausted this is all he can muster up. "A man can want time by himself."

[notarat]

Billy doesn't snap back. He doesn't even feel himself getting remotely annoyed. Maybe it's the lack of fire in the other's voice, or maybe it's just the signs he can see all over the other - the signs that Hickey hasn't taken care of himself at all. That he isn't even making the faintest attempt.

Suddenly he thinks back to the dead fish on the counter. It had been completely untouched. In fact, he doesn't think there has been anything at all missing from their food stash either, other than what Billy ate earlier today.

"Cornelius."

His voice has more energy in it this time. It's the shock of the sudden realisation, but also a little more than just shock. Because if this is true, then--

"When did you last eat?"

[friendsfordinner]

There's a long silence.

That tells Billy he's not going to like this answer.

After a moment or two, Hickey answers with,

"Few days ago. I just haven't been hungry lately."

He moves slightly, only to grab a blanket and pull it further over himself, as if shielding himself from Billy, from the world as a whole.

[notarat]

Pretty much a split second after the other man draws that blanket further up over himself, Billy's hand is landing on the same blanket to instead pull it down, leaning over in an attempt to catch a glimpse at the other's face, despite the way Hickey is turned away from him. His second hand moves to gently land on the other's cheek, hoping to find.. something. A sign of a fever, perhaps. Something that could explain the other's behaviour in a way Billy might actually be able to understand.

Anything that isn't something about this place having crawled underneath Hickey's skin, destroying him from within. Something Billy has no idea what to do about.

But of course there's nothing. Hickey's skin isn't especially warm underneath his touch. If anything, Billy's own fingers are warmer, the way they have been ever since the aurora passed. Everything about the other seems normal, even if - at the same time - everything also seems incredibly wrong.

"You have to eat."

A few days. And it's not like any of their bodies are in the best shape in the first place, after everything back home. How long can this continue before Hickey's body slowly starts giving out?

The thought alone threatens panic in him.

"Come on, get out of bed. I will make some dinner for you."

[friendsfordinner]

When he feels Billy's touch on his skin, it's...warm. Nice. Comforting. The shadow at the foot of his bed hisses and recoils, whispering in Hickey's ear that he doesn't care, he's only being nice, he sold you out for his own advancement before and he'll do it again, he doesn't know what you did.

But the feeling of Billy's hand on his cheek is grounding in a way. Hickey still wants to stay in bed. He still wants to push himself away from everybody else, to keep to his own, he doesn't need any of them. But...it's nice to feel Billy's touch.

He doesn't get out of bed. But he moves, adjusting his position so that he's actually looking at Billy, meeting the man's eyes as he lays in bed, still underneath that blanket.

"And then what? I get out of bed. I eat. Do the same thing tomorrow. We left one frozen hellscape and were thrust into another one. What does it all matter?"

[notarat]

"Now you're starting to sound like me."

Look, this is just self-awareness, okay. He knows who the more optimistic one is between the two of them, and it sure isn't William Gibson. Sure, he prefers to think of it as being realistic and not delusional, but now it's being mirrored back to him like this..

Dry remarks aside, he doesn't move his hand off the other's cheek. He was initially only planning on keeping it there for a moment, but something about Hickey turning to actually look at him feels important. It's the most contact he's had with the other so far, and considering he can see what a loss of it leads to, he doesn't want to let it go now.

If this thread is all he has to hold onto in order to try and pull Hickey back to his usual self, he'll tug on it, alright.

".. but we are alive. Living matters." Wasn't that the whole point of the entire mutiny? Because they both understood just slowly following people who lied to them the entire time stumble along in a way too large group would never keep them alive?

Billy wonders if Hickey will even realise or remember that in his current state.

"So you.." His voice trails off, almost awkwardly. He's never been good at this, after all. Being vulnerable. Expressing said vulnerability. But if logical sense isn't working on the other now, what else does he have but to attempt that?

Still doesn't make it easy, though, even if the sentiment is true. His fingers grow a little more tense against the other's skin.

".. you cannot waste yourself, Cornelius. I.. want you to live."

[friendsfordinner]

Hickey doesn't move from the bed. But he's still looking at Gibson, looking up at the man, actually paying attention, a far cry from his attitude before.

He wouldn't want you to live if he knew what you did. What happened afterwards. Everybody wants you dead, everybody knows you deserve to die. Living matters but do you? Do you really?

Hickey reaches out an arm, lightly resting his hand against whatever nearby part of Billy he can feel. It turns out to be the man's leg, and his fingers brush against it.

"You're the only person in this entire bloody city who thinks that."

That's not true. But Hickey's too far gone, that Visitor has been whispering in his ear for far too long for him to realize that right now.

[notarat]

A part of Billy figures it's not true. Logically speaking. After all, apparently Hickey had told Kieren all about Billy's end back home, and yet Kieren didn't seem to speak badly of Hickey at all - which is saying something. Besides, even aside from that part--

"You've never let that stop you before."

It's not like he hadn't witnessed Hickey standing there, a noose around his neck, plenty of men volunteering to help execute him, and yet talking like there was nothing at all going on.

All of this just means that whatever has dug its claws into Hickey has gotten them in there deep.

Billy is quiet for a moment, watching that hand reach out to him, feeling that light touch. The hand against Hickey's face withdraws, but mostly so he can instead brush it against the other's hand, fingers lingering there, like he's pondering whether to hold the other's hand or not.

In the meantime, he speaks.

"Or are you saying you suddenly care that deeply about the opinions of our crewmates?"

He obviously can't fully know what your average townfolk's opinion of Hickey is, but it's obvious to guess they would rather see the man gone.

[friendsfordinner]

The touch feels grounding. Billy's hand on his, his fingers on his, it feels grounding in a way that Hickey hasn't experienced before. Billy's here. Billy's with him.

Not for long, the voice whispers in his head.

But maybe now is different. Who knows.

"They're set in their opinions. 'S not like I can change my mind about any of it all." Not what he did. Not what he had to do to survive. Hickey isn't ashamed of that, he'll defend what he did. But that point remains. Even if he somehow found a way to send everybody back to their homes, Little and Goodsir and Jopson would still look at him like he's scum.

"It's...aggravating. I try not to let it stop me. But it's still aggravating."

[notarat]

"You could try being nicer to them."

Maybe this isn't the best moment for this side of Billy to come out, but he can't help it. He may not have witnessed Hickey interacting with any of the others, but Billy has a fairly good idea of what it would've been like - especially in a place with even less consequences than there were by the end back home. It makes it hard to not dryly point this out. (It's the sort of thing that Billy knows would usually get the other man all indignant, but now he's not so sure. Even if a bit of life is slowly returning to the other, it's still nothing like the way Billy is used to seeing him.)

Besides, he does know it's not like it'd be enough. Even if Hickey was the nicest person in the world and helped them out tons, Billy is pretty sure they'd just reject that anyway. It's what doesn't make it a serious suggestion as much as just him pointing out that maybe Hickey isn't really helping matters.

Billy thinks about all that for a moment, watching their hands. Then he moves his own hand yet a little bit closer, this time actually grabbing a hold of the other's hand instead of just brushing against it.

"But why care about opinions you can't change?"

He slowly intertwines their fingers, then starts to use that to pull Hickey's hand up. All the way until it's high enough that Billy can turn their hands to push the back of the other's fingers to Billy's chest. Even with his clothes on, the push is enough to feel what's underneath the cloth - something hard and round.

".. I'm still wearing your ring, Cornelius."

It's an easier way to say a whole lot of things Billy can't easily say. Like, why care about those who don't care for you, rather than the ones who do care right in front of you.

[friendsfordinner]

It's easy enough for Billy to take Hickey's hand, to grab it and move it. And when he feels what he knows is that ring underneath Billy's shirt, Hickey's eyes can't help but widen.

That visitor, that shade that's been haunting him for what feels like ages, hisses in agony. But for the first time, Hickey ignores it. The fact that Billy's here and Billy's still got his ring jolts him back to something close to his normal self.

There's a moment before Hickey quietly points out, "Y'know, you can wear it on your hand if you want. This place isn't like home. No worry of the lash."

He's coming back a bit to himself as he adjusts his position so he can look at Billy directly.

"Nobody to suggest we repent our sinful ways."

[notarat]

Their hands drop.

He just.. stares at Hickey for a moment. Silently. The words the other had spoken before any of this had been odd enough by itself, but in a different way. With those, it had just been that all of them had been completely unlike Hickey. But these words? There's nothing about them that's necessarily unlike Hickey in that sort of way, but instead they're just.. generally strange. Impossible. Nobody to suggest we repent our sinful ways, Hickey says, like Billy hasn't been more afraid of eyes and judgement on him in that sense than anything else in life.

But it's not like Hickey would lie about it. He understands the judgement more than anyone else Billy knows, after all. Then why is he saying it? Is this all part of it too?

Billy's body grows a little more rigid. Tense.

"What do you mean?" He says, his voice suddenly impossibly soft.

[friendsfordinner]

"I've chatted with people here." Hickey's words are calm, a little hesitant, trying not to spook Billy as they talk. After all, he knows how odd he felt when Kieren told him this. How worried he was. How unsure he felt about this whole situation.

"People are fine with those like us. I mentioned it to one of my mates and he acted like it was completely normal."

There's a pause before Hickey continues. He doesn't try to hide the wonder in his voice as he muses,

"We don't have to hide."

[notarat]

It's strange how that last place manages to summon two completely different emotions within Billy as he listens. On the one side there is some of the wonder too, similar to what's present in the other's voice. Because imagining not having to spend every single moment of his life having to hide something that feels so important to who he is is an utterly wild concept. He's not even sure he can fully envision it in the moment. Not having to hide. Not awkwardly having to talk around his relationship with the other man or the fact that they're sharing a house. Being able to touch Hickey's hand in public. Maybe even.. kiss, without people wanting them to get hurt for it.

It's the danger in the latter part of that thought that makes the second emotion arise, the more familiar panic at the thought of that judgement. It's strange, the way his panic had felt ice cold back home, but recently in this place it feels more white hot, like a warmth unpleasantly rising in his chest.

He swallows thickly, trying to contain it.

".. you're certain?" Because if Hickey isn't, this could be awful. It could be so terribly dangerous. It's not even that he wants to doubt the other on this, it's more just that anything surrounding this topic is always so terrifying. "You were.. saying things completely unlike you just now, Cornelius."

The other seems a little more clear again now. Maybe not fully there yet, but close. Billy wonders just how much Hickey realises about what happened over the past few days.

He looks directly over at the other as he speaks.

"Is this you again?" Rather than whatever was speaking through his mouth, whatever was consuming him.

[friendsfordinner]

Hickey looks over to where that shadow was...the shadow that isn't there anymore.

Huh. He's got no idea why that thing vanished, what he did to remove that shadow which felt like it was beating down on him. But something obviously happened. Idly, he's a little mad that this place seems to operate without any rules, without any actual idea of how things work. It's not that hard to have actual rules, yeah?

But in practice? That doesn't matter now.

"Yeah," Hickey says, sitting up more upright, rolling his shoulders back, taking a bit of a breath before looking up at Billy with absolute certainty. "Yeah, it's me. Dunno what happened but it's me."

And he leans over to give Billy a quick kiss.

[notarat]

It's such a sharp contrast that Billy doesn't even have to doubt the words. Whatever came over the other for the past while, it seems like it's gone entirely now.

"Good," he replies, the edges of his lips twitching just slightly, like a near smile. As much as Hickey can sometimes be a pain in the ass when he's being.. well, his trouble-causing self, Billy still much prefers it over the way the other looked only a few moments ago. Especially when it comes with kisses.

A quick kiss he very much reciprocates, in this case, but he does pull back a little after it. Mostly so he has the space to reach his arms up, pulling the string out from underneath his shirt and then over his head, the ring dangling off it. Billy's hands fiddle with the knot on the rather frayed string until it comes loose, taking the ring off it and putting said ring down on the palm of Hickey's hand.

"And if you are so certain that we won't be judged here.." For a moment his voice trails off. Truthfully, something does still seem nervous about Billy. It's not like this is a fear that can disappear so easily, especially when he has no proof of the acceptance here other than the other's word.

It's a word he apparently at least trusts enough to try, though, given what he says next. ".. then you should take responsibility."

Billy holds out his own hand. The responsibility of putting that ring back onto his finger, of course. This time to let it stay there.

[friendsfordinner]

Hickey's watching, taking this whole thing in with interest, not entirely sure what Billy's going to do next. All of this is interesting, and he's curious to see what Billy's thinking. The end result, Billy taking off his ring and offering it to Hickey, cause the man to smile.

"Course," he says, with a nod. "I'll happily take responsibility of you and this."

Holding the ring, he delicately slides it onto Billy's ring finger. As far as he's concerned, they're going to make this as official as they possibly can.

[notarat]

He watches the entire time while the other man puts the ring on his finger. Billy didn't get to see it last time around, after all - only the end result. This time he doesn't close his eyes, but he finds what happens once the ring is on there to be the same thing as what happened last time. Without even necessarily intending to, he smiles at the sight. Instinctively, no matter how rare it is for him to smile at any given moment.

It means he also doesn't say anything for a moment, just staring down at the sight of it on his hand again, really taking it in before his gaze rises to meet Hickey's own again.

"I did not say you had to take responsibility of me." His tone is soft, almost a little shy.

The kind of tone used by a person who clearly likes the idea anyway, despite the remark, and who isn't really bothering to hide it either.

[friendsfordinner]

"Well it's too late to tell me that," Hickey sasses, giving Billy a smirk of a smile. It's the same sort of smile he always gives. Something designed to be light-hearted, something that he knows other people might not take seriously, but with a fervent, undeniable hunger behind it all. Hickey is always hungry for more. He isn't a man to settle and this new situation certainly isn't going to change it.

And right now? In this moment? He's hungry for Billy (but like, metaphorically). He's hungry for them having something close to relaxation, something where they can just enjoy each other's company and not have to worry about rules, regulations, the thought of some lieutenant prick telling Hickey to get rid of those urges via climbing exercises. He wants this time to be better.

And dammit, it's going to be.

"Besides, we both know you're going to end up taking responsibility yourself. Can't let you pull all the weight—you're not a steward here, after all."

[notarat]

Listen to this incredibly valid callout. So maybe Billy is the kind of control freak who'd suggest a mutiny over having to go along with poor decisions made for him by others, or the kind who is unable to let an uncertain situation be when there's a potential lashing and exposure of their sexuality hanging above their heads. So maybe he can't resist taking responsibility at all times!!

At least it's not surprising to be as seen by the one person Billy knows sees him in the first place. The only person on those ships who knew these things about him. It makes it less of a callout, and more something kind of nice. A sort of recognition.

"Thankfully." He therefore easily replies to the last part. "I just detest the.. unpredictability of this place. The way it seems to now attempt to kill us from the inside out."

Like whatever happened to Hickey just now. Something that snuck into his state of mind, forcing him to give up. The idea that it could come for them at any time is awful.

"But even that is better than dealing with lieutenant Irving."

Billy's gaze travels back down to the ring.

"I suppose our other crewmates might be just as bothersome if they see this."

[friendsfordinner]

"Actually? They might not be." Hickey frowns a little, counting off their crewmates as he talks. "Crozier won't do anything. Doubt Goodsir will either. Little'll warn you away from my devious seductions and Jopson will probably be a sarcastic bastard, but I don't think they'll actually do anything."

He shrugs a little before pointing out, "And if they do, I'll give them something in return."

[notarat]

A part of him wants to point out that sure, they might not do anything - none of them have any power over them here, after all - but that they will definitely judge, and that's bad enough to Billy. But that feels like just a bit too much of a vulnerable thing to say, even in front of Hickey. Even if he's the only other person Billy knows who might understand.

So he doesn't.

Instead he's quiet for a moment after the words, and then shifts where he's still sitting on the bed.

"Let's not start trouble." Even if it's in retaliation! ".. though, if there ever is trouble.."

You never know, after all. Somewhere between quite some of their number gathered here, and external trouble provided by this place..

"There is something I've suddenly found myself able to do. I can't control it very well, but-- I wanted you to know, just in case. If you can keep this between us."

[friendsfordinner]

Well that's interesting. Hickey looks over at Billy, not bothering to hide the interest in his voice. Because there's something he's suddenly found himself able to do as well. Though he wouldn't describe his gift in just that way. He's changed. That's how he'd phrase it.

"What is it?" Hickey asks. "And what can I do to help you control it?"

It would be stupid to let a gift go unused.

[notarat]

There's a slight huff - more aimed at the situation in general than at Hickey in particular.

"That's the exact problem. I'm not sure how to control it well in the first place."

Especially when the first time it had happened, it had been entirely involuntary on Billy's end. In fact, the words for what he can do feel too ridiculous to speak out loud, so he holds out a hand - the one without his ring on it, because he's not going to immediately lose that in a freak accident, thanks - and stares at it. For a moment nothing happens, making Billy only feel more ridiculous.

He tries thinking back on the last situation it happened in. The circumstances. What he felt. He mostly remembers the red hot panic in his chest, and thankfully their previous topic is easy fuel for that. All he has to do is think about it a little harder, imagine the people in this place reacting badly to his relationship with Hickey, judging him for liking men just as Irving had back home. It's a fear so instinctive that it easily brings the panic back to him, and then--

A flame appears, hovering above Billy's palm. It's nothing too big, but it does ignite out of absolutely nowhere, burning without fuel.