bad luck, old sport

[goingtobeunwell]

Who: Francis Crozier and OTA
What: Uh oh, more bad luck for Milton's other resident old man!
When: Throughout February
Where: Crozier's igloo, the town and the outskirts, the basin

Content Warnings: The Terror AMC™'s specific flavor of horror -- possible mentions of cannibalism, starvation, illness, murder, gore, addiction, Victorians

Comments

[guidemyway]

Right away Ruby felt a lump form in her gut when he said those words. It wasn't too long ago that she had lost someone deer to her too. She still kept one of her swords on the mantle in her cabin.

"It doesn't." And Ruby had very well nearly lost herself while mourning that loss. Her knees feel a little weak but she forces herself to straighten up. "But- we have to find a way to keep moving along with it. When we're ready."

[goingtobeunwell]

"When we're ready."

If ever ready. Life doesn't stop just because you're drowning in grief, but it may never be the same.

"What brings you out so late?"

[guidemyway]

"Yeah."

She had spent the last little while stumbling and flopping around feeling like she'd never be ready to move on again. She felt like things had started to turn around when she wound up here dealing with a whole new set of problems that she didn't really feel prepared to deal with it.

"Couldn't sleep. Heads still kind of spinning after all of that. I didn't know her or anything- But... Back home it's my job to protect people from monsters like that. Here- I guess I'm a little less than confident that I actually can."

[goingtobeunwell]

He should be surprised to hear that admission, but a young woman standing up to monsters sounds perfectly reasonable to him. If he hadn’t known Silna he’d probably be a lot more bewildered.

“Don’t be too harsh on yourself,” he says gently. “We’re all a little out of our depth here, even the monster-slayers among us.”

[guidemyway]

She has to admit, she's a little surprised that he wasn't taken more off guard by that. Her line of work didn't seem to common around here. But his words do take the edge off the pressure she feels in her shoulders about this.

"Yeah. I guess you're right about that. It's not like this place has made much easy around here." And then she sags a little. "And- It's a bad habit of mine to take on more than I should."

[goingtobeunwell]

He's very good at taking things in stride, monster hunters and all. But what pains him is seeing someone so young with so much of a burden weighing on their shoulders. He could have seen it even without her admission.

"And it's equally as easy to take on even more here. Survival is the truest burden."

[guidemyway]

Someone had told Ruby a couple years ago that she had difficult burden placed on her. She hadn't really considered what that meant and the toll it could take at the time. Now she appreciated it a little more- Even if she was still figuring out how to carry it.

"Yeah. But that's what we have to do here, right? Move forward and survive?

If we don't find a way someone else is just going to wind up in this mess and have to do it instead."

[goingtobeunwell]

"We don't have much of a choice, that's true," he tells her with the gentlest of smiles. It difficult to deliver harsh truths, and nothing's harsher than trying to survive when everything wants you dead.

"But we're not alone, that's key."

[guidemyway]

Ruby didn't exactly have a lot of adult figures in her life who were able to give her that kind of advice. Both her dad and uncle had been a little lost in their own ways since she had been little. So it was a little reassuring to hear someone actually lay out for her.

"Yeah. Well- As long as we remember that and work together. Maybe we can pull through this."

[goingtobeunwell]

He smiles. That little word, maybe. No, no, there's no maybe here, not with so many young people. There's a chance here, he'd never say anything otherwise out loud.

"Do you have much of a community where you're from? You slay monsters for them, mn?"

[guidemyway]

Ruby didn't used to be a maybe sort of person. Circumstances back home and now here had it creeping into vocabulary more and more often. Still the question caught her by surprise. She thinks on it for a little and then nods.

"Yeah. Well- There were four kingdoms back where I'm from. Along with other small villages. But- It was our job to stand between the Grimm and the people trying to live their lives. Protect them with everything we had."

[goingtobeunwell]

"But your community is what I meant. Who was your support while you were out there slaying monsters?" Who is this we that she's been implying? Her fellow monster-hunters, family, friends?

[guidemyway]

"Oh. I mean- Well my team. Most of us are sent out into groups of four. There's my sister, Yang. Weiss, and Blake. There's more than that- But they've been with me the longest." There's a pause and she thinks on his words a little before she finally admits.

"I don't think I was always the best at asking for their help though. I guess I put a little more on my shoulders than I should have."

[goingtobeunwell]

Sister too. That seems...difficult. Just difficult all around. He can see those same traits taking shape here, but it isn't as though she can just stop those habits. People here do rely heavily on each other, and those who are level-headed tend to get more done.

"Will you ask for help now? Here?" He pauses. "When you need it, of course."

[guidemyway]

Ruby shifts a little uncomfortably at the question. But she sucks in a breath and contemplates it for a moment.

"...I can try. I'm still figuring out how to do it, I guess." She had kind of been instilled with the idea that she came last in most situations. It was a hard thing to break.

"But- Uh- Thanks. It means a lot just knowing that someone cares." Not that she doubted her team, she'd never do that. But it was her hill to climb.

[goingtobeunwell]

He doesn't mean to overwhelm her, so he simply bends his head in a nod. It's hard not to feel so isolated and alone in this place, especially when a person's not used to seeking help. He hope she considers it when needed, he truly does.

[guidemyway]

She takes the silence and gives herself a chance to breath. There's a realization that it might not have been one of the most encouraging answers.

"I actually talked with my sister a little about it before I wound up here. ...We said we'd try to work through it together. So that our team wouldn't be the one where I had to shoulder all the burdens.

It'd be kind of a jerk move if I didn't try just because she wasn't here."

[goingtobeunwell]

The natural lull wasn't meant to keep her talking, but he's heartened to hear it from her. "Taking what she said to heart keeps her here with you, in a sense."

He looks around the empty area around them, and decides that finally it's time for him to return back to his home. "I think I may actually leave the dead to their rest. You shouldn't stay - you'll freeze."