(closed)

[load_aim_shoot]

Who: A. Rama Raju, Edward Little, Francis Crozier, William Gibson
What: experiencing/dealing with the horrors
When: after the recent Darkwalker attack, around the time of the town meeting, and after one of the aurora nights
Where: one outside the Community Hall, the other on the outskirts

Content Warnings: Ned's fire trauma, little mention of Raju's trauma that I'll CW for on the comment title. If anything else comes up I'll add! 

Comments

[load_aim_shoot]

"Oh." Raju picks out a couple more nails, then moves over toward the next likely place, holding the piece of wood up in front of it. "I remember that. Ah—"

Raju looks away from the nail to Francis' face, not quite embarrassed, but aware that his reasons for never going to the place after it'd been uncovered might not seem as sound aloud. "How are they, the hot springs? Did you try them?"

[goingtobeunwell]

Crozier laughs softly and unabashedly. Despite the initial awkwardness of Hickey staring at him and attempting to touch him, he adores the springs. "Oh, I absolutely did. I try to go every few days. It eases the aches in my joints."

He swings the hammer and the nail sinks in easily. "You haven't gone yet?"

[load_aim_shoot]

Raju shakes his head, watching the arc of the hammer. Raju might not know enough to judge the rest, but Francis is good at this part of it; good enough aim to hit the smaller target and not the larger one right next to it, with the confidence to keep the hammer on its course. "I, ah..."

He huffs a laugh at himself as he sets the next nail into place, shaking his head. "Walking out of that cave was bad enough without even going in the water. Going back into the cold again. Didn't want to get too used to being warm. Does it help your joints for long, afterward? Or only while you're still inside?"

[goingtobeunwell]

"You're overthinking. It's relaxing, Raju. You should indulge every once in a while."

He motions for Raju to hold another nail up and readies the hammer. "And yes, it helps my joints for the rest of the damn day."

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Raju huffs an amused noise, smiling downward for a moment. That doesn't feel right, but he can't quite figure out the argument, and so Francis' point has to win. But he supposes an older man with an older man's problems would sing the praises of a hot spring sooner than Raju himself would, anyway.

"Does anything else help?" he holds the next nail in place obediently, thoughtlessly following the urge to solve this new problem. "Rice is too dear to use in a hot pack here, but there must be something else. Sand if we could find it, something to tie up in a cloth and put next to the fire until it's warm enough."

[goingtobeunwell]

“Fresh meat,” he answers, determined now to drag Raju off to the hot springs so he can try it for himself. He’s far too pragmatic for his own good; it’s getting in the way of small moments of potential joy.

“Fresh meat keeps the scurvy away, vegetables and fresh herbs. That’s what’s best for the joints now, never mind the rest.” Keeping the scurvy at bay will always be his first concern.

Crozier steps back to inspect their work. “You are eating well, are you not?”

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“Mm?” Raju’s distracted from his determination to actually mind the rest, to make something that at least can be warmed by the fire for Francis if he should see a way to, by the question. “Ah.”

He gives a sheepish half-smile, a shrug. “There’s been plenty of time for gathering herbs,” he says, both because it’s true and because it’s the safest part of the question to answer. “The ones that grow here, anyway. I think I’ve had enough rosehip tea to last me the rest of my life.”

[goingtobeunwell]

He laughs, “good lord. I’m tired of rosehip tea! I’d rather drink bark water at this point.”

Crozier sets his hammer down for a moment to look for yet another hole to patch while he has two more good hands to help. “You’ll come to the spring with me, mn?”

[load_aim_shoot]

Raju looks surprised, then amused. “For my joints?” he asks, not really protesting so much as putting off the moment when he says yes, and poking a little fun at Francis on the way. He goes for another couple nails and then turns back, raising his eyebrows. “I don’t eat that badly.”

[goingtobeunwell]

"For the cold!"

He motions to the next hole and the plank that he's fairly certain will get the job done. "For the cold! And because it's an indulgence, and suffering for the sake of suffering is something I do. Christ, is this what I sound like? I want to kick my own arse."

[load_aim_shoot]

It's impossible not to laugh. It's a fuller laugh than Raju's used to hearing out of his own mouth, at least in recent months, and he feels it in his chest as he reaches for the next plank. "You don't sound like you like suffering now. You sound like you're wanting to drag me down into your bad habits with you."

[goingtobeunwell]

"Having a soak isn't a bad habit. Trying to relax isn't a bad habit," he scoffs, but he can't keep the amusement away from his own expression. Raju's laugh is large and fills up the dusty room, and it's horribly endearing. He should do it more often. "Hold up the plank and the nail, we're nearly done."

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Raju holds up the plank and nail where he's being asked to, but his warm, happy gaze doesn't move off Francis' face. "But what do you do after you leave the springs? It's already freezing, soften yourself up before the walk back and you'll get home a popsicle. It sounds like a terrible habit to me."

[goingtobeunwell]

He knocks the next few nails in rapid succession. “You stay in long enough that stepping out feels refreshing too. Honestly, I think you’re giving this too much thought.”

Crozier grins and hands him the hammer. “Finish up this patch while I fix us something to eat.” Nothing fancy, of course, some sort of stew with unevenly-chopped root vegetables. The height of Arctic gourmet!

[load_aim_shoot]

"Mhm," Raju says, taking the hammer, but he'll be watching Francis curiously more than watching himself using it. He glances at the hammer every now and then, but his hands each know exactly where they are, and there are more interesting things to be looking at.

"Where did those come from?" he asks, once the vegetables come out. "You found them?"

[goingtobeunwell]

“Dug them out with my knife a few days ago,” he tells him, said knife coming out now to chop. “Queen Anne’s lace and arrowroot. The arrowroot is mainly filling, but the Queen Anne’s lace is similar to a carrot. Good in a stew.”

[load_aim_shoot]

Raju sets the hammer down absently without thinking about where as he makes his way closer. Asking how Francis spotted them might give away the answer to that earlier question, about whether he was eating well. Well enough is the answer, of course, but that enough involves more rationing of canned goods that are going to run out eventually than anything fresh, for all the time Raju spends wandering outside, and there's no point in inviting something like the look on Akhtar's face, when he'd seen the state of Raju's cupboards at home. In Delhi. Closer to home.

"You go out looking for those things often?" Raju asks instead, watching from over Francis' shoulder. "How far do you have to go?"

[goingtobeunwell]

“Every time I’m out checking the traps or walking into town,” comes Crozier’s answer. His foraging is more casual than it is a concentrated effort — unless, of course, he’s providing supplies for everyone else.

“The arrowroot was in the brush behind the cabin, not far at all.” He makes a few more choppy cuts and then just outright offers the handle of the knife to Raju. “Here. Do this part for me.”

[load_aim_shoot]

Raju takes it with a pleased noise, happy to show off skills that, before he’d started living in this place and living out of cans, had been relatively new. They still feel new. Tip of the knife resting on the counter, handle moving, Raju starts making precise, neat work of the rest of the cutting.

“So we might find some the next time we’re out,” Raju says, planning already on trailing along more often as he spends more of the days here. That would be convenient; maybe he’d learn how to spot them without letting on that he needs to know. Then, first round of cutting done, he looks over at Francis, looking proud of himself. “What size do you like them? Smaller?”

[goingtobeunwell]

Those are very nice knife cuts indeed, and he smiles in approval. "That's fine. They'll cook evenly now." Half-cooked arrowroot is less delicious than fully-cooked.

Crozier pulls a pot off a crooked shelf and rinses it in some of the meltwater. "You can help me on my trips out," he adds lightly. "If you can spare a little time for me that is, I know you keep busy. I like to leave things for the others at the Community Center, but my capacity is limited."

[load_aim_shoot]

“Mhm,” Raju agrees in a pleased sort of way, watching. “I might owe you the help, I’m sure I’ve eaten your work enough times when I still slept there. So I suppose I can make time.”

He gives Francis a smile that’s half-trying to spread over his face and half-trying to hold itself back. See the mighty sacrifice Raju will be making, how terrible it will be?

“How much do you find? How often? I thought there was hardly anything growing in this place, nothing but rosehip and the damned trees.”

[goingtobeunwell]

“You suppose,” he repeats, definitely not grinning in a teasing sort of way. He holds out his hand for the chopped up vegetables so he can get them to a boil.

“I find a fair amount growing on my walks. I forage a little here and there, mark down what I find and where in my notebook. You just need to know where to look.”

[load_aim_shoot]

Raju grunts in surprise, hurrying to rinse his hands in the meltwater Francis had used on the pot before he touches the root directly.

"Mm, thorough." He finishes rinsing, then scoots all the chopped pieces off the edge of the counter and onto his other hand and pours the little pile onto Francis' palm carefully. "How do you remember where if you find it in the woods? Everything there all looks the same, doesn't it? A rock, a bush. What kind of landmarks do you use?"

[goingtobeunwell]

Crozier tosses the roots into the pot and then follows it up with some fresher meat from one of his traps. "Cardinal directions, paces from well-worn roads and paths, buildings. I'd like to chart coordinates but I don't have the tools for it.

"How's your memory? Any good?"

[load_aim_shoot]

"Mm?" Raju looks up from the pot where his gaze was lingering on the meat, then smiles. "Good. I've only gotten lost in the forest here... oh, a handful of times. But it's been a while since I've spent so much time outside a city. And I'm getting better at it. Between the direction of the sun and my own memory I can make my way around. I'll make a good assistant for you, don't worry."