singillatim | (closed) may catch-all

"Irving, I presume."

It's the name that would make the most sense. After all, Billy is pretty sure that he's the only person from the crew to show up so far, unless he missed someone else being around in town. But the sheer energy that the other man is giving off here and a single look at Hickey's expression tells Billy that whoever the other is talking about, it's definitely not someone Hickey likes.

So Irving then, surely.

.. but even if that part is easy to guess, he truly has no idea how that encounter must have gone down. Billy knows that he himself was capable of more or less awkwardly playing nice with Irving when he saw him earlier, pretending nothing at all was up, but it's different for Hickey. Especially when Billy knows Irving remembers his end. And in the worst case--

"Please tell me you didn't do anything drastic." He likes to think the other is smarter than that, but judging by the tortured expression on Billy's face, he can't rule out the possibility all the same.

"Fuck you," Hickey grumbles, though it's the grumble of a man who knows he's being read for filth instead of a man who is actually angry. Because yeah, 'don't do anything drastic,' that sounds like the sort of thing Hickey might do. And they both know that he did something drastic back home: stabbing a man twenty-odd times, desecrating his corpse, and blaming it all on the natives. But in his defense, Irving sucks.

"Nah, I didn't do anything drastic. We talked. Might have gloated about the fact that I know how things work here and he's running around clueless, but I didn't cause any problems."

At least, he hasn't caused any problems yet. Hickey is practically vibrating with spite, ready to cause problems if given the opportunity.

Well, at least that's a relief. It takes the worst case scenario off the table, and it's not like he can really blame the other for gloating at Irving. If anyone knows how big the temptation is to sass right back at that man, it's Billy, though he's obviously a whole lot better at actually holding his tongue. Having done so earlier while having met the man himself hadn't felt great, but it had been a protective measure to try and preserve his and Hickey's life here.

So there's just a small hum on his part. Not disapproving in any sort of way, but not really approving either. Maybe more just confirmation that he heard the other as he further steps into the home.

"He is afraid of you," he points out. Granted, it's a pretty obvious fact given the last thing Irving remembers. But Billy's own observation of the other earlier today confirmed it.

Letting out a huff of breath, his eyebrows drawn together into a clearly troubled frown, he adds: "Let's hope that is enough to keep him out of our way."

And Hickey out of Irving's too, given how likely those sorts of encounters are to explode when even a single encounter has already left the other with this energy.

Afraid of him?

Yeah, that tracks. Hickey suspects that Irving is afraid of anything remotely different, anything that doesn't fit within the confines of his limited worldview. And Hickey knows that he is vastly different than what Irving would label as 'normal' or 'safe.'

"It should be," Hickey nods. "If it isn't, I'm sure that something'll happen sooner rather than later to divert his attention away from us. It isn't like this place is quiet with regards to it's nonsense."

He sighs.

"It better."

The last thing Billy wants to deal with right now is Irving. In so many ways. Just when you think life might be getting tolerable, John Irving comes along. It feels like some terrible truth of life at this point.

"I know he can't do a thing to us here." Honestly, Billy isn't too sure whether he's still trying to calm down Hickey or just trying to reassure himself at this point. Maybe it's both, considering he can feel the nervous energy dancing in his own veins. "But I still do not want to have to handle his judgement. Or have him say awful things about us to the people here."

Sure, there are some of their other crewmates here. But even if they know about the things Hickey did, they at least don't know about this. Not to mention that most of them seem to have known better than to make any dramatic statements to the population at large. And while he does feel at this point that Hickey was right and Irving wouldn't want to draw too much attention to it either, the possibility still sits uneasily inside of him.

Now that much is true. Hickey knows he can weather people saying things about him. The lashing, the attempted hanging, the mutiny. He doesn't like it. Truth be told, he's prefer both events where he was roundly chastised in front of the entire ship to not have happened in the first place. But Hickey knows how these things work. Billy's more perceptive, more caring about that sort of thing than Hickey is. After all, Billy's the one who sold him out to Irving to save his own skin.

Or maybe Hickey knows words and judgement and gossip don't mean that much to him because he's shed identities like a snake sheds it's skin, moving from a previous name to Cornelius Hickey. He'd do the same if he were the first one here. If he arrived in this place with no Little, no Crozier, no Billy.

"We've both got mates," Hickey points out. "And just as importantly, we've got different mates. You've got people you're close with who I'm not and the reverse is also true. Irving starts to gossip, Irving starts to slander us and we've got more people on our side than he realizes."

There's a moment before Hickey chuckles, "Besides. Far as I can tell, the only person who shares his judgement so far is Rorschach. He's in piss poor company in that regard."

There's definitely signs of his reaction - the way his lips press a little closer together, the near roll of his eyes - that shows that Billy very much agrees with Hickey's own assessment of that man. In fact, Rorschach may be even worse than Irving, because he's violent on top of it all. At least Irving isn't dangerous as much as he will just be incredibly annoying.

Nonetheless, he knows Hickey is right. Logically speaking. It's just that there's that awful feeling in the pit of his stomach again, the same nerves he felt back when Irving first found out about them. Even Billy realises that worrying about it won't change anything though, trying to force the feeling down.

"But we are still keeping it from him. For now."

He figures Hickey can easily agree to that. Even if it feels inevitable that Irving will find out sooner or later, every moment they can spend without his potential harassment is great. It doesn't sound like Hickey bothered to tell Irving either, after all.

"I have told some people in town about us, but I don't imagine any of them are the type to get very much involved with him, thankfully."

"Course we're keeping it from him," he nods. After all, Irving might not be violent. He might not attack Hickey and Billy where they sleep. But fuck is he annoying. Best to put off dealing with his annoyance as long as they possibly can.

Because yep: Hickey absolutely hasn't told Irving about him and Billy living together. He's not an idiot.

"Some of my mates know about us as well. But yeah, I can't see them getting involved with him—or if they do, even mentioning us in the first place." After all, it's not like this sort of thing comes up in day to day conversation.

You'd be surprised just how many people discuss the situationships of other people if you know where to lay your ear, Hickey..

Not that Billy is going to say that out loud. He doesn't want Hickey to get agitated all over again. And he doesn't want to worry either - even though Billy knows the worry is going to stick somewhere inside of him, the way it always does.

So rather than mentioning anything about it, he exhales, stepping away from where he was standing and over towards the other man, so he's directly in front of Hickey when he speaks again.

"I made sure to emphasize my request for his discretion when I spoke to him earlier." So hopefully that'll be enough to keep Irving's tongue from wagging. Billy can't imagine Irving is particularly enthusiastic to speak of it in the first place, but a little shove can't hurt, right. "But, if he does end up somehow speaking of it to others.."

He pauses for a moment. The topic is a little awkward, because-- yeah, Billy does realise that what he did sucks! Even if he does think he has good reasons for it, and even if it's leveled out by Hickey having killed him, putting them on even ground again in his mind, there is some awkwardness in bringing it up because of that. But they can't just ignore that elephant in the room. Even more so when Billy wants to make one thing very clear here.

"Then I will make sure to tell him the truth. I don't want my lie to persist here." Especially when it has lost all its purpose here, when lashing or worse is no longer on the table. ".. you mean far more to me than his opinion does, Cornelius."

There's almost something a little shy about the way he says it. He's never good at being so straightforward about his feelings, after all, but-- it's true. The last thing Billy wants is for Irving's presence and Billy's own past lie to ruin the good thing he's got with Hickey here. Screw that noise.

Hickey gives Billy a small little smile and a nod. He means more than Irving's opinion. That's...nice to hear. After all, home was different. Back on Terror, what mattered the most was Billy keeping the status quo, keeping everything just so and not losing his standing. But what does standing matter now? What does standing matter here? It feels so wonderful for Billy to realize that he can just throw all that away.

"Careful," Hickey lightly teases, though there's nothing serious in his tone. "Statement like that could give a man an ego."

Or, at least, more of an ego than Hickey already has.

"Can't give a man something he already possesses," Billy indeed dryly points out.

Sorry, babe, he truly likes you, but he's pretty sure no one here in town has an ego larger than yours!

"Besides, meaning more than that man's opinion is not a particularly high bar to clear." Granted, back home it had been different. But even there it hadn't been about Irving. It had never been about Irving, ever. Billy has gotten annoyed by that man's self-righteousness enough times that if Irving hadn't been one of the officers he was there to serve, he would gladly have avoided the man for the entire duration of the expedition.

Practically anything means more to Billy than Irving does. Hickey is right to think that - more meaningfully - it's the notion of standing that he's surpassed, rather than that.

"Or meaning more than that man in general, really. He is not even attractive."

Implying that a certain someone whose ego doesn't need to be inflated here is.

Of course Hickey's attractive. He is well aware that he's attractive. Still, he preens a bit at the compliment which is absolutely inflating his ego more than Billy'd like.

"He really isn't attractive," Hickey points out, with a little nod. Even if you ignored the holier-than-thou attitude and fear of anything outside his tight little morals, it's not like John Irving is cute to begin with. As far as Hickey's concerned, he's generic.

Though thinking about Irving and his station brings up another concern in Hickey's mind.

"D'you think he'll try to boss you around and go right back to the lieutenant and steward way of things? Little still hasn't shed the vestiges of Terror, Irving's going to cling to it even longer."

There's an instantaneous frown on his face the moment the other brings that up. At least the frown isn't aimed at Hickey - it seems to be half just Billy having to consider it, and then half the annoyance he feels at imagining a scenario where Irving still tries ordering him around, even here.

"Little didn't try," he first says. He hasn't really brought up his interactions with the former lieutenant, considering there have hardly been any and it never felt relevant, but.. it's only now that Billy realises Hickey might actually not know this. With the impression Little gives off, still seeming to stick so much to everything he knows from back home, Billy realises that what happened between him and Little is not exactly a natural conclusion Hickey might reach. "He fed me when I first got to town. And he immediately started speaking of how our ranks no longer exist here, and then he called me by my name."

Billy is making A Face. Are you seeing this, Hickey? It's almost kind of comical. Like half-awkward, half-looking like he just smelled a turd. What is he supposed to do, hear that man call him William and then call him Edward? When literally the only person he bothers to address by their first name is his lover? Ugh. Never. You can't make him.

".. mind you, this was even after I informed him that I hadn't been kidnapped by the mutiny as he had been assuming."

Yes, he's being very sassy right now, but that's just what talk of the lieutenants does to him, okay. You haven't dealt with them as closely for years the way he has, Hickey.

"I can't imagine Irving doing any of that though."

Then again, it's not like he would have imagined Little doing any of that either. But Irving is definitely a much, much further shot even so.

Edited 2024-06-07 21:36 (UTC)

The fact that Little fed Billy pisses Hickey off in ways that he can't really explain. Any self-examination, however, is immediately dashed when Billy mentions that Little called him by his name. Which...ew. Why would he do that? Is that supposed to be some way of making an overture of friendship? Does Little not realize that's awkward as all hell?

Hickey's perfectly fine with the sass and can't help but let out a little chuckle at Billy's dry response about being kidnapped. Yes. Kidnapped. The man who helped start this whole mutiny thing in the first place was kidnapped. People really could be blind to what they didn't want to see.

"At least with Irving, we don't have questions about the mutiny to worry about to begin with," Hickey muses. "What with it being after his time and all."

"Oh, I am certain he'd find out soon either way. I can't imagine Little won't inform him, even if it might not be right away."

Still said a little dryly, since this talk is definitely putting Billy into one of his sass moods. Though it's not like he doesn't have some more information to offer here. He may have done a little bit of snooping. Mostly because the more he knows about how Irving is deciding to live here, the easier it'll be to figure out ways to stay as far from the other as possible.

"Speaking of, it seems that the lieutenants have decided to share a house together. I imagine Irving will move in, which means they would be staying over on the Outskirts, far away enough from us." Just imagine if they somehow accidentally moved in across the road or something, Hickey. It'd be a scenario straight out of a nightmare. "The less contact we can have with our former crewmates, the better, I'd say."

The lieutenants sharing a house together. Truly, some men just can't let go of their time on Terror. Hickey has a suspicion that if Little had a choice (or at least a backbone), he'd be asking Crozier or Gibson to join in. Hickey shakes his head in disbelief before musing,

"Jopson's been spending more time in Lakeside recently. Honestly, if he can convince the rest of them to move out there, I wouldn't say no."

There's one crewmate who Hickey still has mixed feelings about (no use guessing who it is). But as for the rest of them? It'd be useful if they could fall off a cliff or something like that.

"Y'know, we're overdue someone on our side arriving here," Hickey muses, with a little shrug. "Tozer? Manson? If Hodgeson showed up, I'm sure I could sway him back to our little group."

.. well, at least he will agree that it couldn't hurt to have some people around who might be more inclined to see their side of things. Billy wouldn't necessarily be excited to see them, considering he didn't really have warm feelings for anyone in the mutineer camp other than Hickey, but they could be useful.

Though he's also considering the topic that led them to this mention in the first place. He's fairly sure Hickey didn't intentionally jump from that to this, but just in case, he has to ask: "If they did show up here, you would not let them stay in our house, right?"

Right, babe? Because Billy sure is pulling a bit of a face again at that idea. He really just wants to live as domestic of a life as one can get here with his lover, and not have to deal with any of those people walking in on them in the middle of it. Forget the Darkwalker, the true nightmare is having to share a house with the mutineer freaks group when he could just be sharing it with his husband.

"Course they're not staying in our house," Hickey says, without any hesitation. This is their house! They fuck here!

"But after we're taken care of, I wouldn't mind slipping a little game or offering up a blanket or two to our former friends." After all, the more allies they get in this place, the better. And Hickey knows a very easy way to get people's attention: food.

Thank god. That's one less fear in Billy's life. He really doesn't want Hodgson being pathetic in the background while he's trying to make out with Hickey. Absolutely not.

"I can't see a problem with that."

Especially because he knows Hickey won't skimp out on providing for himself first. It's just how he works, and Billy knows it. If the others get some scraps, then-- sure, why not.

"Are you certain they would all be willing to side with you again though?" After all, Billy isn't sure how much time has passed between his death and the last thing Hickey remembers. Anything could have happened within their mutineer crew since then, especially given how explosive any situation out there was. And Billy isn't sure if this means nothing really changed, or that Hickey is imagining situations to be far better than they actually are again.

"Manson would," Hickey says, without thinking. "Armitage as well." Both of them were so desperate, desperate for survival, hope, recognition. It would be easy enough to convince them to stay on his side.

As for the others...

"Hodgson, probably not at first. Maybe in the end, if he's hungry enough. Tozer...I'm not sure. I'd think so." But Hickey knows that he and Tozer were brought together by very specific circumstances, circumstances that he's not sure could be replicated here.

"But we could sway more to our side. People'll do anything if they're hungry enough."

There's a slight quiet moment, like maybe Billy is contemplating that last part. He does agree with the other's opinions on who is more or less likely to be swayed - though Armitage is mostly likely if Tozer is involved as well, as much as he was always chasing the marines around.

"Did something happen between you and Tozer?" He then asks. Apparently that's what he was thinking about.

Billy does think that Hickey could mean it in general, considering Tozer does seem kind of headstrong, but Billy also doesn't think of the man as being particularly bright. It probably shouldn't be too difficult for Hickey to pull the same thing off all over again. Unless it was rooted in some experience Hickey has, but Billy couldn't experience anymore. "After I.."

.. he just lets that sentence trail off, considering they both know what words would follow, instead shrugging lightly.

After he died.

There's a moment where Hickey frowns, debating what to say or how to say it. After the pause, he lands on, "We both know Tozer's been fine with the mutiny since day one. But after that attack, when that bear attacked the camp before I was about to be hung, he's been...rattled. Apparently he saw the bear suck someone's soul out."

Which honestly? Hickey believes. That thing obviously wasn't an ordinary bear. Tuunbaq, something that looks like a bear but thinks like a man. A vengeful god, taking it's anger out on all of them. Of course it could suck out a man's soul. Why wouldn't it?

"I don't know how he'd react to the Darkwalker," Hickey points out. "Considering everything related to that thing. He could be his normal self. He could be on our side. Or the moment he sees what that thing can do, the moment the Darkwalker claims another victim, he'd fall apart at the seams."

Of all things Billy expected Hickey to say, this wasn't one of them.

And no, it's not even the soul sucking comment that gets him. After everything he's seen in this place, he's completely willing to believe that creature was capable of something like that. The disbelief does not lie with the creature, it lies with the man. His eyebrows rise, clearly looking surprised.

"That got him?"

.. though the surprise comes with an instant edge of scepticism. Towards Tozer, that is. Never pass up a single opportunity to be judgemental of someone else, okay. Especially not when none of it makes any sense.

"That creature had been tearing people to pieces for ages." And yet Tozer had seemed relatively casual in the face of that. Joking about shoving people and all. "And that is where he draws the line?"

Hickey shrugs in a sort of 'mate, I don't know either' kind of gesture. Because he really doesn't know why that was the breaking point. He's not the sort of person who cares much about things like 'souls' to begin with. They might exist? But they also might not. And anyway, it's not like it matters after you're ripped apart.

"S'pose it was his breaking point," he muses. "Man can only take so much stress, after all. And everything related to the expedition was very stressful."

Even if you didn't take into account the murderous bear god, it was still a rough time.

Well, he won't deny the stressful part. That's something he also experienced a lot. But--

"I just thought Marines were supposed to be made of something tougher than that."

What good is it if they break down over something as dumb as souls, right. Because Billy can't see the importance in that specific thing when he doesn't really care about it either. Especially when the people who seem to care about them the most are often deeply religious, which is a red flag in and of itself.

"I suppose it is good to keep that in mind if he does show up here." Because-- yeah, there's definitely going to be a parallel with the Darkwalker and the way that being seems to kill people. "I can't imagine the Darkwalker would not have a similar effect on him."

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