oh mama, oh mama, comfort me—

[m1895]

Who: Vasiliy Ardakin (m1895) + others!
What: Assorted non-event happenings.
When: September + a few backdated threads.
Where: Milton.

Content Warnings: Interrogations, flashbacks to torture/mass violence/mass murder. Discussion of the Yezhovshchina.

Comments

[m1895]

[ Vasen'ka. That's what Yuri called him, and it was such a warm feeling. Now, at best, it's mollifying as the space between his sobs stretches out, as they grow weaker and less frequent, dying down to hard sniffs here and there, ragged audible breathing as he tries to catch his breath.

He's never cried like this. It occurs to him for the first time that until now, for the duration of his life, he's never felt safe enough to. Only with Kostya. Only with Kostya, whom he loves more than anyone.

Slowly, Vasiliy pulls away just enough to sit up, wiping at his eyes with shaking hands. His voice is off when he speaks, skewed by congestion and hoarseness, quiet. ]

I shouldn't have lied to you. It's just— [ He searches Konstantin's face. ] It's been so long, Kostya. I've been alone for so long.

[sputnik]

[ Konstantin lets the other man pull back that bit, though stays close, arms slowly unwinding from Vasiliy's back but hands moving to his forearms, broad palms settling there and fingers squeezing firmly as he listens to Vasiliy's voice, worn raw. ]

It's all right. I understand why you couldn't reveal everything. It's okay.

[ He shakes his head, not an ounce of him feeling anything remotely similar to upset by that fact. There's no resentment, anger, no distrust. The things Vasiliy has been carrying secretly inside.... it's so much. Impossible truths mixed with horrifically realistic ones. There's a lot about it all to process, but for now Konstantin's just focused on trying to make the other man see that he's not upset with him.

Though the next words make his heart pang with ache, and he can't hide something wounded in his expression. 'I've been alone for so long.'

He slowly rubs his hands up and down the other's arms, brow knit, eyes locked right onto Vasiliy's. Through it all, that weird fear persists, that fear to lose him. What if what happened to Vasya... happens again? What if he's taken away? Dies here, wakes up somewhere else again? What even caused such a thing to happen? Was it supernatural in origin? He feels like he can't hold onto him tightly enough. ]

You aren't any more. I'm with you now. And I'm not going anywhere.

[ There's never been anything in his life that Konstantin wasn't willing to abandon, if he had to. Not until now. ]