singillatim | awooooooo werewolves of milton

Entry tags:

awooooooo werewolves of milton

Who: open to all, with a special focus on #TeamMoonTouched
What: let's all get together and be a proper pack
When: forward dated slightly to late January/early February
Where: Milton, in and around the church to start with.
Content Warnings: n/a, will edit as needed

The day after the storm clears out, Hickey tacks up a note on the community hall message board. Ever since Raylan mentioned the idea of all those wolf-changed getting together to form a pack, to take down a deer or a moose in a communal hunt, it hasn't left Hickey's mind. There's at least four of them here, probably more. That's enough. They could absolutely take down a moose. They just need to get to know each other, figure each other out, and become more in-touch as a pack. Easy enough, yeah?

So he puts up his notice. And the evening of the meeting, Hickey gets his little soiree set up. He does have food: rabbit jerky, a few jars of pickled vegetables, bottles of water and a bottle of pine wine, all set out on a table he dragged out and placed near the pews. (He's a good host, dammit). The set-up is very informal: it's a place where everybody can chit-chat and get to know each other at the start. Gotta make sure everyone is comfortable before he makes his proposal, after all.

( ooc: feel free to use this as a mingle post! Make your own starters and tag around. While the note on the message board is specifically tailored to the Moon Touched folks, anyone is welcome to crash the party. )

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Kill—" Little looks absolutely shell-shocked by that, surprised for a long moment until it shifts into something that looks horrified instead. Your guys. She must mean...

He does know that she seems to be well-acquainted with Hickey. It's not too difficult to piece this together, even though he hates to assume anything.

"I— yes," he answers that next question instead, too stunned to reply to the first part just yet, ogling the thread. He's been knocked sideways by this encounter!

"How did you know...?" It's there, if he were to look at it closer, some sensation of familiarity towards her spirit.

Chloe doesn't roll her eyes, but she comes damn close.

“We’re at the wolf meeting.”

It's not like that's a huge leap to make at this point!

“But I do know a wolf that I’ve never met in his human body. I was teaching him to hunt rabbits.”

L-look, madam, it isn't polite for a man to assume things, even if they're very obvious.... There's surely at least some here who aren't capable of such beastly transformations, but he mustn't assume anything....!!

Still, he flushes at the very obvious remark. All right, perhaps that was a little stupid. In all fairness, he's been knocked sideways by the whole killing thing from before, barely having time to settle the anxious beating of his heart from that...

And then Chloe drops yet another bomb on him.

"....I...."

Apart from Wynonna and the light grey wolf he's made companions with, there aren't any other women that he knows... and the one in particular had been teaching him to hunt...

He gapes at her. Surely it isn't...

"Ah—! It must be... I do believe I am the very wolf you are speaking of..."

Chloe can feel the immense fluster coming through the stupid string connecting them, and it doesn't square at all with the man she's thought about all this time.

He’d killed Mikel, and one of the other men had praised him for it, said it would likely have prevented future crimes. Even without her association with Hickey, who had come way closer to being lynched at that trial than he would ever admit to anyone, it's not hard to imagine these people saying the same thing about her.

But she can't feel any animosity from him now.

“This bond feels like that. Communicating as wolves. You were so nervous.”

This bond... Edward's eyes, still wide and stunned, drop down to the flickering gold string connecting him to her. It truly does feel like that, like speaking without having to speak, knowing without having to ask, emotions leaking through.

As wolves, that sort of bond made things a lot easier for him as soon as he let himself fall into it, but as humans, his heart is fluttering anxiously all over again. He supposes it was strange that he never sought out to learn who the wolf he'd known was all this time, but... his human brain is so different from his other one. He hadn't thought it to be too appropriate, going around asking Who was the lady wolf I learned to hunt from...

But this is her. He's really taking in Chloe all over again now, and she— she does make him nervous.

"I— do appreciate all of your assistance, there. I admittedly have struggled with embracing that form..." ...Clearly. "But—" His eyes sweep back up to her, still alarmed by what was said before and filled with the need to make certain she knows he's no threat.

"I mean neither you nor your....close acquaintances any harm."

While the man she's been afraid might come after her with a gun doesn't square with what she's feeling down that string, the anxious wolf she’d been so pleased to get to howl with joy for once definitely does. Chloe really doesn't know what to think about it, especially when he says that he means her no harm.

“No? And your captain, guy practically foaming at the mouth at that trial at Midsummer, if he told you to punish me, what would you do?”

Slaves to protocol can be just as dangerous as anyone else.

It is a very strange awareness to have. Somewhere deep down in his spirit, there's a connection to this woman — one that his... other self, if one were to call it that, had forged. A self that's not so constrained by human emotions and limitations. A self that's as close to free as Edward Little's ever been.

But then there's this, all those human emotions and anxieties bubbling and spilling over. The woman's question leaves him stricken. Is that— what she thinks of Crozier? And of him?

(But isn't it a fair question? Especially considering, if she's friends with Hickey... Well. Certainly she might have heard some stories.)

"Captain Crozier would not wish punishment on you, much less try to enforce it. He has no desire to cast judgement on the others of this community, or to govern it at all. His opinion of Mr. Hickey was forged before this place, and he seeks only to protect the people here from the sort of tragedy that he... and the others from our time, are well familiar with."

He puffs himself up a little as he says it, words more assured than they've been through this whole conversation; even now, he won't hesitate to defend Crozier. The man has so much... impossible, unfair weight on his shoulders, even here. But he understands that this is more a question about him, and after a moment adds—

"...But please know that I would never do such a thing, regardless of whomever might command it of me. Certainly not to a woman...!"

There are times he's spoken up against even his higher command. One may have difficulty believing it of him, given how low his head hangs, but.... he has known what was right, what was decent, and he had questioned even his captain's decisions on more than one occasion, at times to his own detriment.

The shock and discomfort pouring into her from this man makes Chloe’s stomach cramp. Yes, she's afraid, but the type of nerves Little is experiencing is unfamiliar.

It's interesting to see that he's much bolder and more confident in defending others than he is in defending himself.

“Imagine you're new here,” she says, careful. He's actually listening to her for the moment. “And the first person in this place to help you with no conditions gets jumped in public and most people just stand there and watch.”

Fraser had stepped in, but what if he hadn't been there? Would anyone have listened to Kieren?

He stares at her as she speaks, and the brief moment of something that might have constituted as assurance in his own words, the broad draw of his shoulders, slowly deflates. He's reminded, with another twist in his stomach — this one sharp and freshly unpleasant — of Lady Silence. Silna; he's learned her name, finally, during his time in this place.

They had thought they were doing right. The same as here, in this place — the men from the Expedition who showed up here, all of them with flares of alarm towards the man who'd done so much damage in so many unspeakable ways. But... what must it have looked like, to the rest of this community? (Lady Silence, weeping over the body of her father, over so much violence, thrust upon her and her people so suddenly. Jopson striking at Hickey in the Community Center itself, before a host of witnesses.)

"....." His eyes fall away for a moment, and there is shame in him now, rushing through. He never wanted this. Someone feeling... fear of him, of his men. It was horrific to see in Silna's face, and it's horrific to feel from this woman now. It makes him sick.

"I deeply apologise for the impact our... conflict with Mr. Hickey has had on this community. On you, madam." His eyes lift again, wounded but earnest. "We are meant to be dignified, to serve with decency, and— it wasn't supposed to be this way. It is a complicated matter, but— that it has bled through to those here, that it has caused such turmoil... I am profoundly remorseful." He shakes his head sadly.

"We would not harm you. I would not harm you. And— I would not allow harm to come to Mr. Hickey, either. If anyone were to attempt such a thing, I would do everything in my power to stop it. I vow this to you."

Chloe’s resolve wavers, feeling the shame rushing through the string that's connecting them. She remembers the rush of the freedom that they'd shared as wolves. Is that a solid enough foundation to build any kind of trust on?

“Someone attacked him in his house, too. Not one of yours, though. Billy Gibson told me about it.”

How do you feel safe in a community that's been poisoned against your closest friends? What would happen to her if she admitted to her own crimes, both at home (though she doesn't think those are a big deal) and at Midsummer (huge deal)?

“But still, I'm glad to hear that from you. I just want to live my life.”

If it were even possible, Edward frowns more deeply at that, mouth tugging down at the corners with a sweep of worry, his perpetual stomachache worsened. Attacked... He hates this, all of this... conflict.

"Attacked by one of this community? Not... the Forest Talkers?" In his and Gibson's own home... This is exactly what he's been afraid of, and he makes a mental note to check in with William again soon. Somehow, though he certainly has no place to, Edward feels responsible for the man's safety on a level beyond even some of the others.

'I just want to live my life.' ....Speaking of Gibson, he's reminded very much of what the other man has said to him, now. Perhaps it's no wonder that she's made friendships with him, and Hickey.

"I understand. And— you have every right to, madam." It's similar to what he'd told Gibson once before. "That you should feel threatened by our men... it's deplorable. I assure you, I will do whatever I can to assuage such concerns."

“Yeah, this was before what happened with the Forest Talkers.” Not that they hadn't been attacked by them too but that's to be expected.

“A guy broke into their house at night, then freaked out that they were there together. They only got out of it okay because of Billy’s power.”

What in the world? He is aghast at this news! Breaking and entering... and then to hear that William utilised his power, which Edward has witnessed for himself in person...

It's all so violent. He truly hates that any of this is necessary — it just further solidifies his need to try and help keep this community in better shape and order.

Edward's voice drops to something barely above a whisper, head tilted towards Chloe's. "I'll not ask you to divulge potentially sensitive information, but... is this assailant someone you believe we need to worry about in the longer term?"

Chloe snorts, dismissive. “I doubt you do. They might, and me too.”

Rorschach provides an essential service, but he had told her once that women are inherently untrustworthy, and he's clearly regressive in other ways. Chloe can handle a guy like that, but maybe not if he breaks into her house.

“I never know with some of those people, if their rules are different for men and women.”

Little's sense of alarm is just blaring louder and louder again, and he actually looks up and around the space, as though worried this Assailant In Question might be lurking around anywhere. (Which... given Rorschach, he could actually be.)

Different rules for men and women — he knows this to be true, especially in the particular ways of his own time, and he's very distressed thinking about it. The brutality women are subjected to — he'd known of it, of course, but in the safety of his home, of growing up as he did, he'd never quite witnessed it for himself. Not until Terror, when a certain horror spiked through him as the men crowded Silna with so much fear turned to anger. It was— shocking, it was appalling. They'd been like animals, hackles raised and bristling, wanting to hurt something before they could be hurt. He'd never seen Crozier so angry in all of his life.

"Madam," he starts, eyes wide and intense. "It isn't right that you should feel threatened by this person. Please, know that you can call on me if you need. I can keep watch outside of your home some nights to stave off any possible attention from such a ruffian. I'm quite certain Lieutenant Irving would even join me, or take turns with it."

Sorry Chloe, now this is turning into The Lawful keeping an eye on you...

“Irving,” Chloe says, in a tone that makes it clear that she's heard of him but isn't impressed. “I can't imagine I’ll get a lot of sympathy there.”

Her own interactions with Bible thumpers haven't exactly been positive, and on top of that, Billy had described him in the same breath as Rorschach.

“What's important, I think, is if people are talking about us with you, you make it clear that they can't just do whatever they want to us.”

Little pauses at that remark, remembering the way she'd spoken of Crozier, the distrust she has for all of them. And— she's friends with Hickey and Gibson. She'd used that word explicitly. This isn't a matter to take lightly by any means; there's much that's strange and precarious. Little himself has been smack-dab in the middle of it for months now, ever since he'd struck a deal with Hickey, ever since he'd made connection with Gibson.

He has to keep things peaceful. He must.

"Then I will make it clear," he vows, head tipped forwards. Yes, it's become very apparent to him that he needs to become more involved in these matters... and show more of a presence by Chloe, too. (Sorry, Chloe. This is horrible for you.) "People simply cannot be allowed to behave this way."

He draws himself up again, quite serious about it all. It lingers, though, the comment about Irving. He still doesn't... quite understand the extent of the divide between him and Hickey (and Gibson), though he's been made privy to some of it from Gibson.

"I understand that Lieutenant Irving and your acquaintances here have... had their differences—" (to put it so lightly, there has been literal murder involved) "—but he would be just as horrified to discover that anyone had made you feel unsafe here. He is a good man of strong values, and... and one of my dearest friends. However, if it would make you feel more comfortable, I do not need to involve him here."

Our friends hate each other but he's determined to keep the peace! ....And he's forever worried that Hickey might target Irving again, so getting him involved with one of Hickey's new friends here might... be a bad idea, yeah. Might be best to keep both sides on opposite ends of things. As much as possible. This should be fine.

“From what I've heard, Irving is old-fashioned, even for your time. It sounds like he was a problem for my friends, because of their relationship.” The one upside to Billy coming out at the trial is that she can talk about this openly.

“I'm sure you've probably noticed that I'm not exactly the ideal Victorian lady for a whole host of reasons.” She’s had both men and women spend the night at her house, and not to mention that she's from what was back then one of their colonies. The captain seems cool about it (or else it's some weird manservant thing), but would the infamously old-fashioned guy be? “I don't know what he could do here. I don't know how much power any of your officers actually have.”

He does know about some of that discord, and his teeth worry his bottom lip for a moment. In his time here, certainly most of the men from his time have struggled with certain... aspects of modern culture. For him, it's largely been adjusting to the sort of clothing people wear — not only women, but men as well... Like what Mr. March wears... and the casual, even vulgar way that modern men and women seem comfortable speaking, cursing so freely........ (again, March comes to mind. And Wynonna. And Bigby. Coincidentally, these three are also among his most Respected Companions, now.)

He eyes Chloe again as she refers to herself as not exactly the most ideal Victorian lady. (Wynonna coming to mind again....) It's all very strange, and complicated, and he can see why she has such concerns.

"I understand that there are certain... discrepancies between those from my time and others. It has all been quite strange to adjust to. But... I do feel there are far more pressing matters at hand than our comforts or lack of. Things that were once so important... no longer are, in this place. I am confident that our men understand that."

Which is to say that he doesn't think John's displeasure of Gibson and Hickey's situation will make much voice known here.

"We may have little power as officers here, but... I still feel a need to protect and serve the community I am part of. It is still my duty, and I feel that Captain Crozier, Commander Fitzjames, and Lieutenant Irving share my sentiment."

Jopson... is sort of the dark horse, here. Technically also an officer, but it's different with him, and... he's been a bit of a wild card. Perhaps best not to mention him.

Feeling the man’s emotions during this conversation is so bizarre. Chloe can't brush off his firmly-held convictions in the way that she otherwise might, but it's hard to accept after seeing the fearful way that Billy had described their situation on the ice.

“I’ve found that being away from any kind of society for too long results in the rule of the strongest.” She’s got stories that might curl this man’s hair of expeditions she's been on, outsized egos trying to reenact Lord of the Flies. Lazarevic had stabbed a man in front of her and left him bleeding out in a swamp because he had stolen a single coin from a dig site. “Your group is large, and influential in this place. I remember at the trial, Irving saying that what you did prevented future crimes. Jopson beat Hickey in public and the only reason that stopped was that the Mountie stepped in.”

Sorry, Little, but Jopson is coming up anyway!

“Your captain was furious that we didn't beat him again! I hope you're right about your men, but it's hard to put any faith in that.”

The statement about being away from society for too long, and the way it warps those rules, those structures — the rule of the strongest... It makes Edward's stomach curl again, something that isn't so much shocked as it is... understanding. Because he knows, too, at least some of it. That's the true horror of it all. What a human being is capable of when they're desperate, afraid. Hungry. He knows that now.

(And something in him wonders, abruptly, if he should try to warn her more about Hickey. Because the man she's found friendship with is one of those who'd shown such colours, who is capable of such things. What happens if they begin to starve, really starve, in this place? What might he do again?)

...But it's complicated. It's all so complicated. As much as he has things to fear about her friends, she raises good points about his own. Little winces again, head dipped for a moment.

"The incident with Mr. Jopson... should not have happened." He knows Thomas had legitimate reasons for it; hell, he's come close to wanting to physically hurt Hickey, himself. He's not immune to feeling anger towards the man who'd caused so much despair. (But it's complicated. If the officers had led better.. it might have all been avoided. Who can really be to blame for it all? Little knows it's not ultimately Hickey's fault, even if the acts he'd committed had been inexcusable.)

"You are right, madam. We are influential here — and it despairs me to think of how others might perceive us after such... brutality." And what he'd done.. Little closes his eyes for a moment.

"There is no excuse for what I've done, either. I would not wish to be recognised favourably for it; a murder is a murder, and there will be no forgiveness for that mark upon my soul. This place is punishing me for it, as I deserve." He does truly believe that, and looks back up at her, miserable.

"I am truly sorry that this is the way you must know us. ....I believe I was a good man, once. I believe all of us were. But what happened before we arrived here... None of us can be pardoned from it. I am only horrified that it continues to poison those we come into contact with here."

For once, Chloe bites back her instinct to immediately respond in favour of absorbing what this man is saying to her, really listening to it. Hickey pretty much never talks to her about the expedition and what had happened back then - he wants to move on, and more power to him - but Billy does, and he hasn't exactly left her with the greatest impression of the officers’ abilities in that place.

But at the same time, talking about being punished by a place feels crazy. Punished by the Darkwalker, sure, but they all get that the same.

Finally, she says, “You don't have to condemn yourself to doing all of the same things again. None of you do.”

He might have continually failed to act, and ignored his subordinates as they deteriorated before his eyes, but he doesn't have to make the same mistakes a second time.

“You’re not ghosts. You can be free.”

These people re-creating the expedition and its structure is one of the primary things she’s been afraid of, at least where they're concerned.

It's all something that he's thought much on, for months and months and months now. Edward gives a heavy, full-bodied sigh, and a soft nod.

"I do not want to repeat the mistakes of the past, no. I believe many of us... most of us, fear and dread that happening, almost more than anything."

They've all been utilising what grief they know to try and avoid the people of this community suffering the same fate. Even Hickey has been making his own efforts — facilitating this meeting, speaking about finding large game. And Little's been trying desperately to keep the peace, to stop history from repeating itself. He's even made a deal with Hickey to try and keep him and Irving apart....

But....

'You’re not ghosts. You can be free.'

That part has him pausing with an odd, painful hitch of breath deep under all the layers of himself. He thinks of Gibson, who'd spoken of getting to have a life here that he would not, back home. There is a certain.. freedom. A second chance. But Little can't let himself grasp hold of those things.

"We may be able to live our lives here, for a time. But... we are ultimately dead men. And as a senior officer, I must bear a certain... responsibility in remembering that for us all."

He can't forgive himself for what he'd done, can't move past it, can't see these men as anything but his failures, his ghosts.

Chloe thinks wow, this guy must be real fun at parties before remembering that she's seen him at a party and it was just as sad as you'd imagine.

“Do you think you’ll just drop dead when this is done? You can create a life you're proud of living.”

He is so fun at parties!

"When this is done... You mean this world?"

He's spent much time thinking about that, too. What this place really is, Little can't say, beyond a punishment. Will it ever end? Some people do vanish again, presumably to go home, but even then...

"I do believe we'll return to our place in time. In that case... there is no future for us," he nods miserably. No one survives that Expedition, he knows as much from the things Fraser shared with him.

"But I do hope the others find some joy in this moment, for however fleeting it may last. William—.... I have told him as much, and I am glad that he seems to be living how he likes, here."

awooooooo werewolves of milton

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