singillatim | no one heard you but the stars.

If it'll be dangerous to me now, then there's a risk it'll end up being dangerous to everyone eventually.

[Granted, this is conjecture, but it feels to her like reasonable conjecture. Shaw may not know anything about alien parasites specifically, but she has plenty of experience with the way unknown, uncontrolled forces can escalate.]

Better to find out what we're dealing with as soon as possible, with someone who knows the risk up-front.

[ The thing is, the creature's definitely shown how dangerous it can be, in this place. Even weakened down, it's— it's been capable of killing and eating a man. (His name was Gord. It happened during one of the bloodbaths here. The creature ejected itself, got to him when he was injured, ate his brains right out. Konstantin doesn't know what ultimately happened to the man's body. Someone must have buried it, and no one questioned him, because why would they?)

He should tell her about all of that. If someone's going to get close enough to him to do an examination, he should tell them everything knows about the fucking thing. ...But maybe he'll tell what needs telling, along the way, because otherwise he might scare her off too early, and although she doesn't seem the type to be scared off so easily, it's a risk he doesn't want to take.

He wants help. He should learn whatever she can offer to him. ]

...All right, [ he agrees, hesitant for just a moment but not unwilling. He's already moving to follow her, slipping right back into something conversational and easy-going, ignoring the sharp pinch telling him he's doing something objectively selfish. ]

So you were some sort of medic, before?

I went to medical school. Never actually ended up practicing. Where are you staying these days?

[She's a Community Hall dweller, at least when she's here in Milton - and while that'll do in a pinch, she's hoping that he has a more private place where she can examine him. This feels like an indoors-only activity, but it's one she's not too keen on doing around random civilians. If the supposed parasite is as dangerous as he says it is, the potential for collateral damage is a valid concern.]

Ahhh. That's good. Might mean you're less corrupt. Doctors can be the worst.

[ He laughs a little, only teasing, but also.... ]

A cabin, isolated. I live with someone, but he's probably out.

[ Vasya doesn't sit still for long, and he's likely out in the woods looking for game or making trades with people. Konstantin starts leading her that way. ]

I have something there that might make it easier for you, actually. An X-ray with the thing. I'm guessing you're not too squeamish, but I still want to warn you that it's not pretty.

[Shaw is hoping that "isolated" doesn't mean "far away", but even if it does... it's not as if she was in the middle of anything pressing or time-sensitive. She'll follow along - keeping up easily, but limping just the slightest bit.]

I'm not squeamish at all. Does your friend know about any of this?

He does. He helps me manage the thing. He's an EMT, actually.

[ The cabin's tucked a good ways into the woods, and Konstantin does notice the odd subtle stagger to her gait as they move. He looks over, brows lifted. ]

Are you all right? Is that from something recent?

Bear attack.

[She says, dismissing the topic with a cavalier wave of her hand.]

I'm fine. What's his name?

[ Konstantin winces sharply. ]

Seems to be a common problem these days.

[ Bears, attacks. He gives the woman's leg another worried look over, but he knows shortcuts through the woods and starts leading her on one of those so they don't have to stick to the main road. This should take a lot shorter. ]

Vasiliy. He keeps to himself so you might not have seen him around much, but he's good people. He found out about my... little problem early on, and let me stay anyway. [ He smiles. ] I keep wondering why people don't lock me up in a cell as soon as they find out.

[Shaw shakes her head; he's right, the name doesn't sound familiar. She's interacted with people who she never got around to exchanging names with - social pleasantries often aren't at the top of her to-do list - but she'd remember another Russian.]

Secure cells aren't something we have in spades.

[Which is... probably not the most reassuring thing to hear in response to that.]

Do you want to be locked up in a cell?

[ The question draws another pause, the man's mouth working into a thoughtful frown as he guides her through a little patch of trees and towards the dirt path leading to the cabin. Although she said she was all right, he walks carefully. ]

The noble response would probably be that it's for the best. [ Konstantin looks over at her with a wry smile. ] But my honest one is that I'm not letting anyone put me in a cell again. Before here, I was being held in a... facility. Poked and prodded like a lab rat. Turns out having a parasite from outer space is a big deal.

[ A little dumb humour to try to keep things light, and to counter his nerves. Talking about it is still very strange. ]

Oh, I'm familiar with that kind of facility.

[And with the desire to stay well out of anything resembling one. If he shows sign of imminent attack, she thinks, this information won't stop her from restraining him in whatever way seems the most likely to hold him. But she'll refrain from arguing for anything preemptive.]

Who ran it, government or military?

[A private entity is possible - she'd been held by a tech corporation, after all - but in his case, she's betting it's not likely.]

[ Konstantin quirks a brow at her. Familiar with that kind of facility... She has a medal seemingly from his era, yet said she'd never been to Russia. There are too many pieces about this woman to be mere coincidence, he thinks, and not for the first time he wonders if he should be suspicious of her. It's very possible she even works for the people who'd captured him. Maybe she's been ordered to check in with him now.

He's curious and he wants to know whatever she has to tell him, so he's going to keep going with this. Even if she isn't connected with his situation, the fact she's familiar with such a facility makes him want to know more. Maybe she's been experimented on, too. ]

Parts of it were government. Scientific research. But the military was there, and they were the ones who really had their hands on me. [ He wrinkles his nose in displeasure at the memory as the cabin comes into view — modest, only ever meant for one person to live in. There's a handmade dog house and chicken coop out front.

He takes a chance, though there's no guarantee she'll want to answer the question, but— ]

Were you working there, or an unfortunate prisoner like myself?

Prisoner.

[Shaw's body language doesn't change, nor does she look at him; her steps stay steady and even as they walk along.]

They kept me for about a year in real time, but the, uh-- tests they were running made time feel like it was passing more slowly. It's hard to explain.

[This isn't so much a refusal to explain as it is an acknowledgement that the details of her captivity are entirely irrelevant to the situation at hand. No point in jumping into all the simulation stuff unless he's legitimately curious.]

[ Though she doesn't look over to meet his gaze, Konstantin is staring at the woman as they near the cabin, head turned to face her as he listens.

A year. In comparison, he was fortunate enough to only be a lab rat for a few months, and even that much felt like an eternity, confined to his cell like an animal. He can't imagine such a long time, and he gives a soft curse in Russian, running a hand down his jaw for a moment. ]

....Maybe it's coincidence that both of us were brought here, after experiencing something like that. But I don't think it was. [ How could it be? There has to be some connection. Konstantin steps up onto the porch, reaching to let her in the door first. Curiosity is pressing hard in him; he's desperate for any kind of answers, all too willing to inquire further. ]

Did they have you hooked up to wires constantly, too? Or was it something else?

Yes. And yes.

[Her fingers flex at her sides, grasping at air as she zeros in on that last comment. The coincidence (or lack thereof) of their circumstances is harder to address - in part because she's genuinely torn on the issue, and in part because if it's not a coincidence, then the most likely scenario is that he was invented wholecloth by a simulation algorithm, for the express purpose of sympathizing with her and gaining her trust. And you can't just tell a guy that you're wondering if he's fake.]

They had a feeding tube in me a lot, if that counts; I spent a lot of time stuck in a bed and drugged out of my gourd. But, uh-- yeah, there were actual wires involved, too. Electrodes on my temples, hooking me up to VR sims.

[She turns her head just slightly, watching his face.]

[ Halfway through the door now, Konstantin can't help stopping for just a moment to turn his head and stare at Shaw, unable to quite hide the reaction in his features. It's a quiet kind of horror — quiet, but deep, and not so much surprised as it is... shaken.

(His co-pilot after the crash, alive in only the literal sense of the word. Tucked away in a hidden room under a nauseating fluorescent yellow, tubes keeping his body from finding the peace of death, the steady beeping of a monitor. Although it fortunately wasn't a permanent state for her, what Shaw experienced with that comes pretty damn close to what Konstantin fears more than anything.) ]

...They didn't do that to me, [ he finally says, and finally starts moving again, slowly shutting the door and peeling off his coat. He reaches out a hand to take hers too if she lets him. ]

But it was probably what was coming next. I kept causing problems for them, making escape attempts... [ A faint smile. ] They only needed me to house the creature in, I probably didn't need to be conscious or mobile for that to happen. ...I'm sorry you experienced that. I can't think of many worse things to subject a human to.

[ Being kept as a human incubator was probably the looming thing coming for him, but he's trying to swallow his discomfort down so he can keep the conversation going. ]

What do you mean by VR sims?

[ Such terminology was juuust slightly after his time. ]

[She maintains eye contact as he talks: her expression flat and tired, her mouth drooping in a small frown. It's only at that last bit that her gaze flicks away.]

Uh--

[She squints in concentration, trying to figure out how the hell to phrase this in a way that someone from... the seventies? maybe? ... will understand.]

How much do you know about computers? Video games?

[ By now, Konstantin is painfully aware that despite being at the peak of technological advancement in his own time, his knowledge is considered outdated for most others here in this place. So he allows a small, almost humoured smile as he answers. ]

Probably a lot less than you. It was 1983 back home for me. I've realised that makes me an old man compared to most people here.

[ There were certainly computers and video games, but likely nothing compared to what she'd have access to. As he moves deeper into the room, he gestures towards the kitchen area. This little meeting is hardly a typical social call, but the cosmonaut can't help some normalcies. ]

Do you like tea?

A lot more than I did nine months ago.

[Which is to say, while it's not her preference, this isn't a place where beggars can be choosers. Not to mention that depending on what supplies he has on hand, there's a decent chance that the tea will be hot, and who the hell would turn down a hot beverage in this climate?

She follows him slowly - not fearfully, and not even cautiously, exactly, but she's definitely clocking her surroundings.]

Imagine if we were where we are right now - everything looked real, sounded real, felt real. But it wasn't. Your body was lying in a bed, hooked up to a machine, and electrodes were stimulating your brain and making you hallucinate a completely different world. That's a VR sim.

[ He smiles again at that and moves to get tea ready. He and Vasya keep a pot of water cleaned and warmed at the fire, so it won't take long to fix her up a cup, listening to her speak as he does.

It's definitely more advanced to his own time, but he can certainly understand the concept well enough. ]

...To be honest, I've wondered if this place isn't one big forced hallucination. What are the chances we're hooked up to one of these VR sims right now?

Definitely not zilch. Some days I put the odds at pretty high, but I can't figure out why anyone would make one like this.

[She shoots him a wryly-raised eyebrow.]

But if this is a simulation, then you're probably a construct of it.

[ He has to give a laugh at that, soft but amused, although he can understand the actual severity of such a thought. Truthfully, he still thinks half the people in this place could be part of what he still thinks to be one big experiment. ]

I suppose there's no way to prove anything yet... but if I am a construction, I at least hope I'm an enjoyable one. Especially to such lovely company.

[ There's a tease to his words, playful (and more than a subtle amount of flirtatious) as he hands her a warm mug of black tea. Sorry Shaw, he's like this... (Konstantin, you can't just hit on a lady when she's coming over to check out your alien parasite) ]

Sorry it's a little lacking. No lemons in this place — it's a crime against tea!

[Shaw, certified thirsty motherfucker that she is, makes a point of briefly looking him up and down. She's already noticed that he's attractive, of course - this is purely for the benefit of making it clear to him that she's noticed.

And then she moves on.]

I'm Middle Eastern; I'm probably supposed to have strong opinions about tea. But I don't. Sorry.

[ There's a blossom of welcomed delight when the woman gives him a lookover like that — the implication clear enough for him to read it, and brief enough for him to want more of it. He craves that sort of validation, the kind that says he's still attractive despite what the fuck is so wrong and disgusting about him.

Of course, the real test will be if she's still willing to give him a lookover like that after he reveals more about this situation... but it's a challenge Konstantin will meet. He grins at her, wide and warm and a little wolfish all at the same time as he grasps his own cup. ]

It's lucky for me, in that case, that my tea has a lesser chance of disappointing you.

[ He doesn't take a sip yet, waiting to make sure it cools enough not to bother his unwanted passenger, and watches her instead. ]

Do you know... why they did to you what they did? What their goal was for the tests? The simulations?

[At the question, her focus pulls back: from him, from the room, from everything in the here and now, as she looks off into the middle distance. Despite this, though, she answers readily.]

They wanted to break me, and turn me. I had information they wanted, but I also had skills they wanted. The information was more important to them, so they used every dirty trick in the book to try to get at it: confusing me, making me think I'd escaped and was safe, that kinda thing. But if I was in a fit state to join up with them once they'd dragged it out of me, they wouldn't have turned down the opportunity. They made that pretty clear.

[There's a clear note of disgust in her voice. The idea that she would have betrayed her team is still anathema to her.]

It didn't work. None of it did.

no one heard you but the stars.

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