open / radio killed the penmanship star

[friendsfordinner]

Who: Cornelius Hickey & OPEN
What: futzing with the radio, dog times, hot springs
When: throughout the month of August
Where: Milton

Content Warnings: nudity in the hot springs, will add as needed

morse code / ota
Hickey occasionally is smart. He doesn't exactly know what Morse code is, but he knows that this radio Marra gave him can only send dots and dashes. Obviously there must be some kind of language or code used, simply because it would be remarkably useless to communicate with otherwise. So, might as well do some poking around, see if there's anything useful or any code books in any outposts—Lakeside has the hydrodam, that might be useful. It takes him a while but he finds what he's looking for: a basic guide to Morse code.

Anybody who's got one of the shortwave radios that Marra gave out will soon hear a message repeated, a few times a night, as Hickey tries out his new toy (and also, more importantly, just tries to get more fluent in Morse code):

THIS IS HICKEY. CAN YOU HEAR ME?

wolf mode / ota
Every now and then, Hickey just has to cut loose and enjoy some time as a wolf. It's easier, after all. He likes Billy, he likes his human friends, and honestly it's gotten so much easier here now that certain people have died and/or vanished. But every now and then, when he's focused too much on Morse code or worried about their provisions for the winter or stuck on some boring human concern, he just takes a moment to forget all that.

Sometimes he hunts. Hickey as a wolf is small, with reddish gray fur, and a wirey build. Anybody in the wolf pack is invited—hell, there are times when Hickey goes up to his mates directly and just bluntly asks if they want to hunt this evening. There are times when Hickey can be found out in the woods, squirrel in his mouth, looking up at anybody with a 'what are you going to do about it?' sort of expression. And there are times, few and far between, when Hickey just plays. He romps in the snow, digging down with his paws, shoving his snout in before leaping and bouncing all over the place.

hot springs / ota
Hickey doesn't usually take clothes along when he's in wolf mode. He's destroyed a few too many shirts via shifting and honestly, it's a pain in the ass to get dressed in the cold. He'll go out in the afternoon then come back home at night, happy and tired, slipping through the town when most people are asleep and nobody can bother him (and, just as importantly, he can shift back into a person close to home).

So that means when Hickey decides to take a break from being a wolf and just soak in the hot springs for a moment or two, he does it buckass naked. Dick out, limbs sprawled, just absolutely enjoying his moment of relaxation.

Sorry anybody who's coming into the hot springs and who wants to relax themselves, there's a naked man lying next to the hot springs, feet in the water, back resting on one of the rocks slightly warmed by the temperature, sunning himself like a lizard. Hickey does not want to move right now.

Comments

[fidior]

His relationship with fear is... different now. He still fears many things, but he's realised what the worst thing to fear truly is. Losing control of himself, hurting his loved ones again... it's the most terrifying thing of all.

Which is why Hickey's words elicit perhaps an unanticipated reaction from Little. There's a quick rush of relief, and his brows lift, eyes locked on with attention. This, this is what he wants. Assurance that people won't hesitate to stop him if they have to.

He realised his error in asking Tim Drake to put the metaphorical bullet in him if needed. It wasn't fair to the boy. But Hickey comes to this conclusion on his own, at least in part. Little flinches at that wording about his loved ones though, frowning.

"No one else deserves punishment for my ailment. If there is an incident, you should target the one responsible: me alone." Yes he... wants you to hurt him if you have to, Hickey.

[friendsfordinner]

Hickey simply raises an eyebrow at that. In response, he points out, "Irving, Kate, they're not going to like that."

But Hickey doesn't care whether they like it or not. It's nothing accusatory, it's nothing judgemental, it's just pointing out a fact. He'll kill Little if needed. It would be easy. Hell, it probably would be the easiest thing to do here. But others would retaliate. Others would bother him. And really, that's what annoys Hickey the most: the inconvenience.

"Not saying I won't do it. Just pointing out the obvious."

[fidior]

"No, it wouldn't be... the favourable outcome for them," he agrees, which is putting it much more politely than warranted... Especially considering he knows that Wynonna in particular would be out for blood if anything happened to him; she's already killed someone for his sake... Ideally, Edward can avoid a chain effect of violence...

"But I assure you, it is the outcome I am going to do everything I can to avoid. That's largely why I wanted to... warn others. Especially those whom I feel this.... hunger towards." He stares nervously at Hickey, whose two-feat life force continues to smell particularly tantalising.

"I do not know what might happen to me in the longer term. How I might change." Unbeknownst to Little just yet, the Darkwalker's curse heavily affects his wolf form... stripping it of any slivers of his rational human mind, making it purely animalistic and too capable in the night. A genuine predator. And he won't be able to control it.

"But you and William conjure forth the same... degree of yearning within me. So you need to be warned."

[friendsfordinner]

That's interesting. Hickey remains quiet, listening to Little, but after a moment, he can't help but ask,

"Why d'you think it's me and Billy you want to consume?"

He has an idea. Probably some leftover guilt from the expedition. If I take out these two, if I destroy the vipers nest of mutiny, things would be different. Just that little bit of guilt hanging on - which frankly, Hickey thinks is pathetic. What happened then doesn't matter now. Little should make a break from it. That's what Hickey has done, after all.

(Just ignore the fact that he hasn't made as clean a break from the Franklin Expedition as he thinks.)

[fidior]

He winces at the question, wishing not to be made to think about it so directly, but he will answer honestly.

"I believe it is due to the... responsibility I have over your fates, and what came after." ...Little, it's really not that deep. The Darkwalker isn't actually punishing you, specifically, for your crimes... but he thinks that's the case!! Why wouldn't it be! It's what he deserves!

But yes, there is a shitton of guilt fueling him even all these years later; if anything, it's only gotten worse.

".....I feel some hunger towards Lieutenant Irving and Captain Fitzjames as well, though not as severely. There are so few of you left. So few of... us left." He swallows. "Perhaps it is a rather fitting irony that I would feel the drive to harm my remaining men." When what's driven him for so long is protecting them.

[friendsfordinner]

The responsibility. The responsibility over his fate. Hickey sighs, like he's the most oppressed and put-upon man in the world. Somebody save him from these men and their fucking egos! What responsibility did Edward Little have over someone like him? And when did Hickey ever acknowledge that responsibility to begin with?

"Bugger your responsibility. The only one who's responsible for what I've done is me." Edward can hem and haw and fret all he wants but at the end of the day, Hickey's the one who chose to sign up. Hickey's the one who chose to try and kidnap that girl. Hickey's the one who chose to mutiny. Others might not see the validity and sense of his actions, but it doesn't change the fact that he chose those actions himself to begin with.

"I'm not one of your men. Not here, not now, not ever. So whatever martyr complex you've got going on where you're worried about harming me because I'm one of your men, tell it to piss off."

[fidior]

Little finds himself unexpectedly surprise by the response, brows lifting upwards, body puffing up a bit — from its previously deflated, mournful sagging... It's not explicitly anger revving up in him, but a sort of passionate... something. Anger is there, but so is exhaustion, and ache, and sorrow. ...And determination, if he were able to pinpoint it.

Because this is the reason he came back from his self-imposed isolation after realising he'd become a monster. There are people he has to keep safe. Hickey is included in that.

"You are one of our men, then! I am not your lieutenant any longer, no, I don't mean that. I mean— all of us from before. The ones from our home world. We must protect one another, we're all we have left of... of then."

He swallows, nostrils flaring as he takes a forced breath.

"I know things were complex, but can you claim not to feel anything for them? The ones who are gone now? Goodsir, Jopson— Crozier?"

[friendsfordinner]

The mention of Crozier visibly makes Hickey flinch. Of course he feels something for Crozier. Crozier was the reason Hickey did so much of what he did. It started off as a misguided attempt to prove himself to the captain, to show him how helpful, how useful he could be, it ended up being the same thing, but the yearningness was replaced by a steely determination. Even at the end of it all, even while he was sitting across from the man at camp, Hickey desperately wanted to be seen. To prove himself.

(Jopson, on the other hand, can go fuck himself. Hickey never liked that man anyway.)

"The ones who are gone are gone. We can't do anything about that. Best not to dwell on the dead—focus on the living instead. And of the living, there's me, you, Billy, a man I killed, and a man who's grave I robbed. Complicates matters, doesn't it."