morning dreams are just like memory.

[fidior]

who: Jhey's Freaks + YOU!
what: various catchall things, inbetween threads, backdated logs, etc.
when: December - February
where: various locations

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HMU TO PLOT A THING! @ HAGFISHS

Comments

[fidior]

[ Rather than fear at the woman's threat, what appears in the man's face is a strange sort of relief, instead. His eyes sweep to the weapons on her person and he's giving a sharp exhale, as though a pent-up breath released. He even nods, as though to address what she says as true, but also.... to encourage it.

He remembers, in this moment of lucidity, that it's what he's begged people to do, if they had to. To stop him by whatever means necessary. A few have resisted the idea, a few have accepted. It's a great relief that Aviendha wouldn't hesitate; it puts a sort of desperate trust in her. Enough that perhaps he can keep speaking to her rather than flee. ]

It makes me.... wrong. [ He realises, using the word she had a moment ago. 'What's wrong with you?' ] Too strong. Too fast. Too dangerous. I am—... [ He looks down at his hands. He'd been keeping them gloved, keeping himself covered up as much as possible. Why...? That's right. Because this... demon, whatever it is within him, feeds through touch. ]

There is a presence within me, it feeds.... when I touch another's skin. I have managed to control it for a long time, but now.... it has been freed. The Darkwalker—.... the green fog. Makes it stronger.

[fardareismai]

[There’s something that makes Aviendha’s brow furrow as she watches him for its an explination she doesn’t fully understand. A moment of consideration is there where she looks like she might leave but she doesn’t, she’s looked down enough evil to not retreat this time. ]

Does the urge get stronger the more you do it?

[A parallel she’d drawn from back home. Losing control on something that’s too tempting to avoid, that’s how Rand had described it. Might it be similar?]

[fidior]

[ The question gives him a very serious pause for a moment, brow knit as he thinks upon it. He has to pull himself through the threads of his strange mental state, confused as he struggles to make sense of things like memory and experience, as he tries to extract himself from the horrific hunger roaring within him. Does the urge get stronger the more he does it...?

When he says he's been keeping it controlled, perhaps that isn't quite the right way to put it. It's more like he's been keeping it tamed. But the need doesn't go away, and there's a particular... frustration about it. Edward's just infamously adept at suppressing himself. ]

I.... believe it does, yes. For each time I feed that hunger, it's never quite enough. It's only been... enough so that it cannot overpower me, [ he explains, feeling a hitch of sharp guilt at what he's done to Wynonna and John for all these months. Like a parasite, slowly feeding from its host, never enough to kill them. ]

Are you familiar with such a thing...? The Darkness from your world... [ He casts wide eyes to Aviendha through this moment of lucidity, remembering what they'd spoken about their first meeting. ]